Childs Dad refuses to pay child support, will I be an evil person if I take it to court?

Question

So I have a son who is 5 years old, his Dad has not seen him in over two years, and my son has some bills I need help paying. My son goes out for two sports, and some of the events are two hours away. I asked my ex if he'd be willing to even give me $50 a month to help a little, and he refuses. He says I just want child support money so I can sit around and not work. With all of my sons expenses, I thought $50 wasn't unreasonable to ask for, as if I filed for child support I'd be getting atleast $400 from him. His wife says I just want the money so I have some involvement with him when this isn't the case either. What are your guys'a thoughts?

Answer 1

Get all your ducks in a row, keep your mouth shut, dont ask for a dime, go to your local social services agency and apply for child support it's free. The do all the work for you. Just show up to court. Do not tell him you're putting him on child support. Do not tell him they will be coming after him. Get his correct address so they can serve him with the paperwork. Don't say a word. Is that clear? Don't keep arguing about it. It's unfair him and his wife are both attacking you. How dumb can you get as a wife to even be with a man that goes two whole years without seeing his son. Sounds like a bum. At court you can negotiate an amount. Ignore him in the process and definitely definitely follow througb. Arguing should cease.

Answer 2

I want to live in his world where one can live on $50 per month without working.



Seeking some financial help is not a sin. Nor is having a baby with a complete idiot. If the father had any sense, he would have given you anything you asked for, as it would certainly save him tons more than getting the courts involved.



If you feel bad perhaps your should give your baby's Daddy one more chance after pointing out the alternative expense of court ordered child support, and consequence for not paying (jail), but seeking a larger yearly payment instead of a monthly one to minimize the need to be in contact.

Answer 3

That isnt mean at all! children are expensive and it shouldnt be just your job at alll to take care of your son it takes two to make a baby. 50 is nothing in child support so if he refuses that hes just being difficult and wants to push your buttons if anything he should be happy his childs mother is as nice as you about this! Get a lawyer and go to court, where i live father must pay a minuim of 150 a month even if he dosent have a job. Do not feel like you are being a b**** by doing this. This is about your son and getting him what he deserves from his bio father, every child deserves to be cared and paid for by both parents. Good luck and dont feel bad !

Answer 4

You will not be an evil person if you take it to the court. It is absolutely normal for both parents to take care of their child. $50 for a child support is a ridiculous sum and I hope that the court will oblige him to pay more than just $50.

Answer 5

Slap him in the face with some child support papers. No idiot who produces a child and is given an offer to pay just $50.00 a month should stay stuck on stupid any longer. The judge will compel him to stand up. If he has not seen his son in 3 years that is a big loss but nothing can teach a male how to be a man if his mother never taught him. Tell the judge you only asked for $50.00 and they will know who they are dealing with. You should not have to ask for help. Good luck, hurry up.

Answer 6

You're not being unreasonable. And furthermore, he knows perfectly that $50 a month, or even $400, won't enable anyone to sit around and do nothing. He thinks he can stonewall you with silly excuses like that forever.



Take him to court.



(By the way, I do agree that two different sports seems like a heavy schedule for a five year old, although I strongly disagree that this could be considered child abuse by any means.)

Answer 7

Take him to court so your son can at least have a normal life and not have to pick if its better to eat or play in sports. He is a deadbeat dad. Its what your son deserves. Child support. Shoes, food, clothes. Its his son to even if he does not want to be around. But he should have to pay. Just take him to court. You will win.

Answer 8

The law is there for a reason he cannot just not pay child support it is a law anywhere in the world. Take him to court he is a deadbeat parent and breaking the law he should be paying his fair share and if not the courts will garnish his wages. He is just playing hardball show him that two can play that game and get a lawyer.

Answer 9

The father is legally NOT ALLOWED to refuse to pay Child Support.

The Law feels that both parents are responsible for supporting the child they created ...



Yes, take him to Court for Child Support.

If you do not need the money to spend on food, housing, clothing, school FOR YOUR SON, then set up a savings account at the bank for when he turns 18, or 21 or whatever, and deposit the money into that account.



This money is HIS . .not yours. The father owes it to his son.



Your spouse doesn't know what he is talking about.

Child Support is set by your spouse's income, but it doesn't even cover all of what it costs to raise the child. it is designed to be your ex's contribution to the cost of raising your son.

YOU have to earn money to contribute to the cost of raising your son - even with Child Support - as well as 100% of what it costs to support yourself. But you probably know that .. your ex doesn't.

Answer 10

It is your duty and obligation to take him to court and $50 per month is too little to pay for al of the expenses in raising a child, as he gets older ; $50 will seem like 25 cents. Go to the local social service administration and file a petition and you wil get much more than 50 dollars as well as half of al of the exoernse you must opay

Answer 11

I had to raise 3 daughters on my piddly grocery store check, somehow I got by, my family bought their school clothes and things like that. I filed for child support but it never happened, he had friends at the courthouse I was not strong enough to fight all of that, so I got nothing. Yes, your little boy and you deserve child support, you need it, take him to court or let him go to jail if he refuses. I am old now and children grown and out, don't feel guilty--the boy is his as much as yours, get this done for both of you............

Answer 12

The child is both yours and his. He needs to step up and support the child. I don't know what world he thinks $400 will enable you to stay home, but ok. If you two can't work it out, which it doesn't sound like you can then take it to court.

Answer 13

Its not about you - its about the CHILD. YES he owes you child support from the time you separated and divorced. See a lawyer immediately and file for the proper CS amount based on his income and yours. YOU don't pick the amount - its calculated from both parents (not his new wife) of the child only.



He WILL owe back pay and it WILL come out of his income tax refund if he has not filed yet - do this very quickly. IMO when a parent doesn't want to pay CS, then its best to have it taken directly from his paycheck and the state will send it to you.

Answer 14

I would be happy to pay that amount I pay 1700 a month for 2...hurt so bad I had to live in the hood for years and work 3 jobs to make ends meet. Funny this is based on what a person makes and not a flat rate.

Answer 15

Listen to me. Look into your child's eyes and tell me he doesn't deserve support from his daddy. Go down to the court house and file for child support. Its free. The judge will decide how much is fair. It won't be your decision how much so he can't blame you....he can try but its about the son he made with you

Answer 16

You and your son are ABSOLUTELY entitled to child support from that man, and DHS will gladly help, especially if you're on any state assistance, but coming from a fellow mother in a similar situation, let me tell you what I did.



My son's father hasn't seen him in three years, has never supported him financially, and wasn't even there during his birth. I gave him two chances to be apart of my child's life, and both times he swooped in for an afternoon visit, got to be the "cool dad" for a few hours, and then vanished. I've chosen to remove him from our lives. A man that doesn't want to be a father to my son should be legally taken out of the picture. I don't want a dime from him. I'd rather struggle and work long hours than take money from a man that doesn't care enough to call on his son's birthday. I reported it as abandonment to DHS, logged every attempt I made at contacting him to see my son, recorded calls, and wrote down transcripts. A non-profit legal agency in my area took my case and we are on the fast track to termination of his parental rights. I'd rather have my son grow up with one parent on the birth certificate who fought for him, loved him, and broke her back to give him a good life, have him grow up with a loving working mother and a stranger who sends checks every month because he has to.



I'm not saying it's easy, and I'm not saying it's the best decision for you. All I'm saying is that you and your son deserve better.

Answer 17

Take him to court for full child support and back child support. He will go to jail if he doesn't pay it.

Answer 18

I believe a father should support his children. Take him to court, and squeeze every cent you can from him on behalf of your son. You aren't evil for looking after your child's rights.

Answer 19

Children are entitled to financial support from BOTH parents. That is the law, and pursuing your child's rights does not make you an evil person.

Answer 20

Definately go to the court..n he'll have to pay alot more than $50/month*. They(the dad and his g/f) can say whatever they want....that YOUR after the money etc*.. but its LAW to PAY child support!!! it costs more than $50/month to feed, clothe, etc....n sports which is good for kids to get involved in, feel better bout themselves, keeps them active, team/friends* its ALL Important* Sounds like this ''dad' just wants u to go away but the COURT will ORDER him to pay like you said $400 or more depending on how much he makes ...its his son n he needs to step up ~*~ Gluck* go get legal counsel~*

Answer 21

He made the baby too, and needs to help support the child to adulthood - its not optional, and shouldn't be - for either parent. So go to court get the amount set and make sure he pays. Its that simple.

Answer 22

It's the child's RIGHT to be supported, you are obligated to get the child support your child deserves. The (2) two of you made this baby, you did not do it by yourself. You are doing an injustice to your child for not filing for support.

Answer 23

In my opinion, it is child abuse to put a five year old child into two sports activities, and subject him to repeated two hour car trips for said 'sports'.



Your child's father should be supporting his son financially, anyway. Take him to court, but don't be surprised if the court also finds that you are forcing your child to do too much at such an early age.

Answer 24

Make it so child support is not an option. Take him to court and sue for it. You can even petition for it to be backdated to whenever the two of you split up (may or may not be approved). Then, if he doesn't paid what is court ordered, he can go to jail.

Answer 25

He is responsible for the child he helped produce.He is legally required to pay support.



Take him to court.

Answer 26

Go for the child support. You and your son deserve it.



But I do recommend you rethink this program you have for a 5 year old that includes TWO intramural sports and hours of driving to events. It's too much. It's too much.

Answer 27

TAKE HIM TO COURT! Collect back child support also!

Answer 28

No that support money is your childs right and his responsibility Mom you are SUPPOSED TO take him to court and make him pay what he is supposed to to take care of HIS child

Answer 29

I think you should file, and that you should file retroactively to the first time you requested money. They will do that for you, and the court almost always approves those requests. Why? Because he knew he shared this obligation and chose to ignore it.



Really, if you care what your ex says, you should block his calls, his emails, block him on social media and do whatever you can to ignore him in total, since he doesn't even bother to see his own son. He is not worth your time. Good luck getting the financial help You Deserve.

Answer 30

Yup, apply for child support. If he is man enough to create a child then he should take on the responsibility that comes with it. He needs to be held accountable for his actions!

Answer 31

I understand that you want your child to be social and active however, if you can't afford bills then you should not be paying for sports and extracurricular activities, sorry. In regards to the dad, I do believe the law is if he doesn't see the child, he should have to pay for it

Answer 32

I'd file for child support, he is your ex's son so he should be made to help take care of him. I'd see a lawyer and take him to court. you shouldn't have to struggle by yourself to take care of your son alone. plus if his new wife was in your shoes I bet she would file for child support too. so don' let either of them make you feel bad about asking for help.

Answer 33

While I personally think the CSA needs to die a painful death due to personal reasons relating to my dads, it sounds like he's really not interested in helping his son, judging by the fact that he hasn't seen him in 2 years. You should probably make it aware beforehand that if you were to, that it would be a lot more out of the pocket, as it would probably bring push to shove.

Answer 34

Evil? Not at all. The father should contribute to the costs of his child, Take him to court.

Answer 35

Take him to court. It's your children rights to be supported while underage.

Answer 36

Not at all; It is his responsibility to help support that child; It's the LAW !

Answer 37

You are NOT obligated to pay once cent more than the Child Support order. If your ex wants your son in extra sports....she can get a job and pay for them herself.

Answer 38

listen to me... look into your child's eyeah and tell me he doesn't deserve support from his daddy... go down to the court house and file for child support... its free... the judge shall decide how much is fair... it will definitely not be your decision how much so he for the life of me cannot blame you............he can try but its about the son he made with you

Answer 39

Why are you being so easy on your ex? I don't know the whole story, maybe he's in serious financial trouble or disabled or sick. But if not, your son's needs come first.



I think what's hard is that they have you intimidated by their willingness to judge you harshly. Don't let them control you.

Answer 40

If he really cant afford to pay, court helps no one.



He'll fall behind then imprisoned.



He cant earn anything behind bars nor would he be able to spend time with his kids.

Answer 41

His wife has nothing to do with your son, she is just giving it the big "I am" coz she thinks she has the right to get involved coz she married to your baby dad. Lol cry me a river, she has **** all to do with it thus should keep her fat nose out



Take his ***** *** to court

HE is the evil one for not giving You **** about his son, or else he would have seen him and give him financial help



Baby daddy sounds like a tweeb

Answer 42

He got you pregnant, and by law it is his responsibility to help provide for his child. If he wants the be a POS show him what it's like to suffer.

Answer 43

Take the bum to court. By the time it's all over he'll wish he'd just given you the $50 per month you requested.

Answer 44

You should have filed for child support years ago. Child support will not give you contact with him, so his wife is as stupid as he is.

Answer 45

You need CS. The older your son gets the more it will cost you for his clothes and everything.

And medical insurance.



His wife wants the money for herself and is selfish...so is you ex.



In this state, a dad pays CS or goes to jail.

Answer 46

Heck no. Take him to court. I know how this works. My dad is the same way. You need the money for your son.

Answer 47

you will be a horrible person if you make him pay for child support

Answer 48

yes its his duty to support the child, after all he made him to, i went through child abandment to, I took him to court and now he gives me 250 euros a month, not bad ha?

Answer 49

He should have taken you up on your offer for 50 a month. He helped bring him into this world and he should help with the expenses. No offense but his wife sounds like she is on the nutty side.

Answer 50

No, you won't be an evil person. That's what the law is for!

Answer 51

No, take him to court and let a judge decide the right decision.

Answer 52

No you aren't an evil person. He should be responsible for his actions.

Answer 53

He doesnt care about his son. Sorry but its true so i suggest you just let that *** go and get a job. It might be tough but it is better than to be feeding off some *** that doesnt want anything to do with his kids.

Answer 54

Going to court is right.



Keeping him from visitations is wrong. Not even trying to visit is also wrong.

Answer 55

Take the advice all these people have given you. Of course you are not evil. He is evil and selfish.

Answer 56

The father doesn't have to pay child support.



In the UK the law is, if you do not see your child then you don't have to pay for the child either. The reasoning behind this is because they found that some men were being trapped into having kids and then being forced into paying for them, regardless of whether or not they see them.



I'm not saying you've trapped the baby dad into having the child, I'm saying I agree at the fact a father doesn't have to pay for a child if he doesn't see it.



Not sounding harsh but food/clothes and a roof over the head is more important than doing activities, if you cannot afford activities it's just logical to find alternatives, cheaper for your self or no cost at all. Don't depend on the money of a guy that doesn't see his son.

Answer 57

Go to court and sue the deadbeat, why the hell have'nt you done it before? ignore the wife, none of her business,tell her to keep her nose out!

Answer 58

On the contrary. You would be robbing your child if you didn't

Answer 59

Who filed for divorce him or you ?? If it was you then do nothing how is he responsible for activities you decided on and no one is entitled to anything. Wake up this is reality

Answer 60

yes of course he should pay for his child

Answer 61

nope you wont be evil.. take the SOB to court and get him to pay for his child..

Answer 62

$50.00? If that's all you think you need you should put your child up for adoption~!

Answer 63

Won't make you evil. He agreed to it by screwing you.

Answer 64

Honey.............get help............and know the dad is just as much responsible as you are........

I pray both of you show lots of love in the end to this child..............Best of Luck.

Answer 65

Only if he's not the father

Answer 66

No. just do it for he is an evil who you should not have scruple。

Answer 67

Get check by your gynocologist.

Answer 68

NO... That is what the Courts are for..

Answer 69

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcUz-YGYzT0

Answer 70

No

Answer 71

No