Do you think it is o.k. for a married man to visit adult chat rooms and have chat sex with them?

Question

Do you think it is o.k. for a married man to visit adult chat rooms and have chat sex with them?

Answer 1

1

Answer 2

He is mad at you because he has no other defense. He is guilty, so trying to turn it around on you was his only option.



I think that he is in the wrong, but I don't know how you should handle it. I would try and stay in control of the situation. Ask him strait forward questions that require a answer. I would act all cool and collected (although you may be ready to blow your stack), maintain yourself. I would also call and cancel the Internet.



I know what your saying. I am a woman that visits chat rooms and men are very bold. Some start off with I'm married is that a problem? Some of them don't have a care in the world and others talk about their wives and children.. I would not want to be in your position and I think that sexual conduct in chat is just as bad as the actual act of adultery. Good luck and God Bless....



But take a stance and don't back down!!

Answer 3

I can't believe that he would turn around and get mad at you for finding his trash. What you should do is keep gathering all of the evidence that you read and when the time come, you will have what you need. I will say to you, I'm sorry to read this. I know that you are hurt to have to sit there and read this garbage from your husband and to have him think more of this trash that he has never met. I am really hurt for you right now. It is one thing to have suspicions that your mate is cheating, but to actually see it for yourself. I know this to be true. I had my ex husband's cell phone to call back to the house and I overheard him talking to his friends about a female that he had screwed the night before. i heard what position he had gotten her in, how much of our money he had spent on crack for her. So I know that you are hurt, not wanting to let go and really hoping that he would stop this behavior. You don't deserve this, most of us doesn't deserve this type of treatment. It is so sickening to me to know that men act this way and can look at you and think you are suppose to love them. you are suppose to not say anything, and wait until they announce that they no longer want to be married. He haven't even reached 40 years old and is already searching for young scags.

Answer 4

chatting is not cheating

but that's not what he is doing

he is actively seeking an affair

that's why he is on adultfriendfinder

(there are better sites by the way)

this isn't a little naughty chat

this is the beginning of the end of your relationship!

the man's a low life

find some one nice

take control and do not be used like this

HE IS RESPONSIBLE for his own actions he knows what he is doing and knows what it will cost hiim if he is caught

its clear he does not care

trying to stop him is like trying to stop the tide.



he will just become more and more secrative

your life is going to change and quickly

make sure its in your favour not his!

or

you could just visit a few swingers clubs and both have some fun!

Answer 5

You're right, you don't deserve this. You should leave him and then he can have all the chat sex he wants. I'm pretty sure it won't be as good as regular sex and he'll feel like a big moron once he's realized what he's lost. I'm serious - get out because he's gonna be looking for real sex soon and you don't want any part of that with all of the diseases out there. I totally think any kind of sex (phone, email, chat, physical) is cheating.

Answer 6

Why do men always say "its my personal business" when they get caught doing something they KNOW they souldn't? I'm sooooo sick of this private emails, men going on sex sites, chatting with other women and then getting mad at their spouse when they get caught. You need to be assertive and YELL if you have to "The only reason you're pissed off is because you got caught, and I'll keep looking and keep finding out as long as you keep doing it."

I don't know, I'm mostly Irish, and I've got bigger balls than most men. Men need to quit hiding behind anger and own up to their infidelities.

Good luck honey and give him hell!!!

PS: I'd overnight you a pint of my hot Irish blood if I could and thought it would help!!! :-)

Answer 7

My husband did the same thing and had a similar reaction. I found out that he even met one of these "women" in person. Be careful if you have kids that use the computer, ( there were also pics to and from him) and that is something they do not need to see or read. But my advice to you is to print the conversations out and leave. he doesn't deserve you and wont change, at least mine didn't. oh and by the way.....leave a copy of the conversations on his pillow before you leave with the address of your lawyer!!!!!

Answer 8

Oh no sweety. That's not OK...

Cyber sex is like having sex, just virtually,.. If he can engage in sex on the internet, he is likely to engage in sex in the real world, as the chance arrives. I dont think he has any right to get mad.

If he's sexually not setiasfied at home, he should be a man about it, and tell you. And you two can work something out.

Answer 9

No...No...No....It is not alright for a married man to visit these chat rooms...I know it must have made you sick to your stomach that this person that you love and trusted could be so dishonest. I really don't know what to tell you about what you should do next but I do know, if you tolerate his behavior he will continue to do it... It sounds as though he don't care that it hurts you. You don't have to put up with his crap. I understand you are a good person but his sexual addictions have nothing to do with you. They are his and his alone. I'm sure it makes you feel as though you have done something to make him do this, but you haven't. He really don't deserve a good woman, sounds as though he likes trash, if thats the case. Try talking to him to see if he can get help for his problem...if he refuses, divorce him....

Answer 10

You better get his *** in gear... This is a bad scene and no married person should be anywhere on the e-net talking to or watching sex things.. He needs counceling sweetie and you are right you dont deserve this so dont stand for his BS.. Good luck Grant M in Pennsylvania

Answer 11

"Do you think it is o.k. for a married man to visit adult chat rooms and have chat sex with them?"



Uh... NO. He also has no right to be pissed at YOU when you catch him cheating. That's him lashing out at you to divert attention from his own wrongdoing.

Answer 12

You already know the answer to your question. The question is what are you going to do about this? He is an ****** for doing this to you. I would throw the F'n computer away.. what do you need it for? For this crap?? Let him know that if he continues this activity that you will leave him.



I don't like the sound of your husband. He doesn't sound like a good man. If your as good as you say you are then you definately don't deserve to be treated like this.

Answer 13

that's right you don't deserve that so don't put up with it. don't waste your time chasing him. if he won't agree to stop now, then is that the kind of man you signed up to marry? think not. tell him he can have is chat rooms, or you. he needs to pick. then stare at him. keep giving him that choice until he answers. if he answers you, then he needs to agree to stop the chats and let you monitor the computer until the trust has been regained, which who know how long that will take. if he won't answer your choices, then tell him you won't stay married to him - AND MEAN IT!!. you don't want that kind of person for a husband. yuck.

Answer 14

Absolutely not! It is NEVER ok for a married man to be chatting online with women and visiting dating sites. He is MARRIED! That means that his "chatting" should only be done with you. The only way that this would be ok is if YOU are ok with it, which you obviously are NOT.

He is looking for someone to meet. That means that, if he hasn't actually had a physical affair, soon he will.

You DO NOT deserve this! No one deserves to be treated like this! You need to get away from this man. He is trolling for women and has already been cheating in his mind and in his heart. I know its scary...thinking about leaving someone you love but, he doesn't love you enough to stop this, has no respect for his wedding vows and will only continue to hurt you if you don't get away from him. I'm sure there is someone else out there for you, who will love only you and be faithful. Please, please, please...don't do this to yourself. Go on with your life and be happy. I will be praying for you.

Answer 15

That's shameful! And that says something,coming from a 13 year old ;). Obviously you guys need to re-consider your relationship. Try a marriage counselor.



But most of all, just be honest with each other and ask him WHY?

Answer 16

he is doin this right there when you are home?there is obviously a problem with comminication.you need to let him know you will not allow this behavier in your marriage. you need to fix the computer so he cant even get on without the password and block the web site that will fix him .if he has problem he is up to no good and is probebly cheating on you with these people.

Answer 17

i think it is funny to make your own accounts and not let them know what your info is, yet leave the log in window open with your screen name visable to make them wonder. even if you never log into it. only the guilty will look into that....it would eat him alive and he so deserves it. i know that won't solve anything but it will sure make you feel better when he starts asking you questions! and NO it is not ok and after you have fought with him over it and you are satisfied then log into it and show him there is nothing there! on and delete the cookies and history everytime you get off the cpu.



my husband stays on the desktop all the time just on myspace and playing games, but we always aruged over it so i went and bought a laptop of my own and he don't have the pass to get on and use it and all i do is set here all night and do this, which is harmless and takes up a lot of time and it eats him alive to know "who i am talking to"

Answer 18

It is not OK for your husband to cheat on you like that. However, I had a net friend for 9 years and I chatted to her all the time but in a non-sexual way. My wife also knew about her and my net friend knew about my wife.



He has no reason to be angry at you especially when he is the one trying to hide his online affairs. Perhaps you need to be strong and confront him strongly.

Answer 19

Been there done that. No it is not ok. At the least it is emotional cheating, but probable or has already led to more. Talk to him. Does he want a divorce? This isn't ok. Does he want more sex from you? Ask him his rationale for this. Do not just let this be.

Answer 20

No, not okay at all! If he caught you in that, he wouldn't be very happy either I hope. Maybe you guys need to have a little more excitement in your lives? My marriage counselor was great and he told us we needed at least one date a month, even though I've never had to deal with anything like that, but if I did, I would tell him we're going to counseling or we're done.

Just a tip! Hope it helps!

Answer 21

First ,if I were her I'd get go get tested for HIV. He could have been seeing other men for quickies. Gay men are notorious for thier promiscuity( no offense intended). A "straight" guy is NOT going to post himself in a gay site. A definate strain on a relationship. Hope things workout ok for you and your daughter.

Answer 22

do you even have to ask? disloyal has no place in a marriage. As for his anger at you, why honey you caught him and now that you know some of his thrill is gone. The internet can be used in so many hurtful ways....

Answer 23

No, its not okay, your husband should be paying attention to you not those other 'women' if it continues at home, take away the computer have it into your personal codes so that he can't use it.

If it continues, you need to get him out...one way or the other.

Answer 24

Its Ok to go into chat rooms...but your husband went beyond that. Even after you confronted him, he still goes into them. Trying to stop him isn't going to work. If you cant make him agree to counseling with you then show him the door.

Answer 25

im a man and , i will tell you the truth if he in chat room just be careful not all men are looking for some other action but many are.and if he is its time to close the door.

Answer 26

No woman deserves that. I will never understand why a man wants to do this, especially when you are right there for him. He will never change--Cut your losses and find a good man.

Answer 27

No, it's not okay.



He's emotionally betraying you if nothing else.



And trying to divert the attention back to you by abusing you for looking at his email.



If my hubby called someone else 'princess' and said he loved them I'd be devastated and start packing.



Good luck.

Answer 28

This is cheating. He may not be having physical relations but that is the next step. At the very minimum he is being disrespectful to you and your marriage. You should be ready to leave.

Answer 29

No it's not okay, and he has no business getting pissed with you because you caught him. He's an ***, throw the computer out the window.

Answer 30

I would put a hammer through his hard drive...whichever one suits me...the computer or his personal play thing. Or maybe both.....He is cheating. Cheating is cheating whether it is of the mind or the body.

Answer 31

Is he taking something away from the relationship....YES!! big time...he's emotionally starving you or throwing you "crumbs" here or there. You need to ask him why he is giving up on his vows..that should either make him mad or cause him to ponder a little. good luck.

Answer 32

ur right in saying u not deserve this... and i think also that u don't deserve him to be ur husband.... y is he visitng and having sex chats with those women.. ask urself... are u giving him enough sex??? is he even contented when u have sex together???

Answer 33

No way. What he is doing is adultry even though he isn't touching physically, he is still giving of himself to another person other than his spouse.

Answer 34

No it isn't ok! And you shouldn't condone this behavior out of him. Tell him to get out of the chat rooms...off the computer and plug into your relationship...If he doesn't tell him to get the h*ll out of the house and to take his stupid computer with him.

Answer 35

turn the tables on him an you go into adult chat rooms an let him find out you were there, if he gets mad then you tell him you do it why cant i

Answer 36

NO Way,what the H*** is wrong with him?

Your right...you don't deserve that.You'll never trust him anymore no matter what.

Answer 37

It isn't OK for MY husband to do, and it's not OK for me to do. I would have no problem with your saying it isn't OK for YOUR husband either. It's your marriage, and this is not a minor issue.

Answer 38

no it is not okay, your husband needs to check himself at the door. he is being selfish and pathetic he needs to chat with broads and go on adult finder...what a retard!!!!!!!

Answer 39

yhere is nothing wrong with it . your man is just making fantasy,but try to watcth him. he might do to other women more than that.

Answer 40

HE IS PLAYING WITH YOUR FEELING AND HE DOESN'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK BECAUSE INSTEAD OF SAYING SORRY HE GOT MAD. THINK OF IT THIS WAY WOULD HE LET YOU DO THAT? WHAT WOULD HE THINK IF HE CAUGHT YOU DOING SOMETHING LIKE THAT

Answer 41

no he is married to you and should be loyalty i feel so bad for you don't let him hurt you if he wants to do ''it'' with other divores him good luck!

Answer 42

no its cheating the next step is to meet these people

Answer 43

I'd give him a choice...me or his computer sex.

Answer 44

This is common sense. What's ok for me may not be ok for you.

Answer 45

Nope, nor would he appreciate it if I did it either.

Answer 46

So why are you still there? Leave! My motto is....if she can have him, then I don't want him......

Answer 47

OMG ! NO ! this man is CRAZY ! cut him loose.

Answer 48

No, it isn't okay.

Answer 49

no there is no other answer.

Answer 50

NO, IT IS NOT OK.

Answer 51

KICK HIS *** !