Will I get married? ?

Question

I was watching Tyra the other night & they were saying that 70% of black women are single.

I'm 20 years old, in my third-year of university, & have never experienced a true love. I desire it very much. I'm a Christian & believe that God has someone for me. I don't drink, party, or smoke & I am saving myself until marriage. I have my small group of friends & I'm studying elementary education.

I desire to be a wife & a mother too, I'm not overweight or terrifyingly hideous but at my university, I haven't had one single boyfriend. I also do not behave like the stereotypical, neck-rolling, attitude-having black woman. I desire romance & I want to date w/ the intentions of marriage? I just wonder when my ship will come in, because sometimes I feel like I'm wasting my youth & I don't want to be a part of this terrible statistic?

Someone please give me some hope.

Thanks for the replies.

Answer 1

You are what my grandmother called "unfound treasure". Some one will find you one day.



You are very young yet but you are making some great decisions for your life such as getting a good education to assure a living for yourself, waiting for the "right person etc.



The right person will come along and will be worth the wait. And from what you have said about yourself, I think he is going to be a very lucky young man.



Stay focused on your studies, your church, your relationships with friends and family and one day probably when you least expect it, there he will be.

Answer 2

Oh where to find a good man...



First of all congratulations. You have high standards and don't fall into the stereo type. What you need is to look a little bit closer at the

college crowd. You have already seen the obvious: The party animal and jock... and you are not impressed. Good.



The man you are looking for isn't found at a party. You will most likely find him at the library or study hall. Because he has a goal: To get his education and have a career. He is most likely not interested in short term relationships and seeks a woman that is also goal orientated and not a party girl.



I would take a closer look at the math majors and business majors that actually have high grades and study and therefore aren't interested in wasting their time. Befriend them and hang around them.

The rest should come on it's own. But get ready to make the first move because these gentlemen are usually shy... but well worth

your pursuit.



If this doesn't work then join a church and seek your future husband from those circles. Once again you will have a better chance in finding somebody that fits your own profile and standards.

Answer 3

Maybe you're not putting yourself out there enough. College is about trying new things and seizing opportunities. That doesn't have to mean participating in the typical college debauchery but get and join as much as you can. Join a youth group if you aren't part of one already and become a part of a few school organizations that interest you. You'll meet people with the same interests and values as you and you're more likely to meet a date-worthy man.



But don't only date a man you'll think you'll marry. You're young and have plenty of time to find the perfect man, but that's a lot of pressure to put on a guy, so look for someone you can be happy with now and if doesn't lead anywhere then move on.



And if you want to play to statistics, asian men are in the category with black women as the most single. Just think, you'd have the most beautiful babies.

Answer 4

You'll be fine if you're in a university, have a good attitude, and believe in finding the right guy before jumping into bed with them.



I think that statistic includes all the women who USED to be married but then got divorced or are with a guy but just never got married to him. Unfortunately, I've seen that many times with white and black women these days.



You're only 20 years old yet so don't worry about being an Old Maid quite yet. If a nice, educated, guy asks you out on a date, take him up on it and you'll be just fine. Or. . . if you see a nice, educated man that you are interested in--ask HIM out on a date. Typically, the best places to look are at the university, at church, or at some kind of club that you're interested in (such as a Drama Club, University Newspaper, etc.)



I had just given up on finding the right guy for me when I bumped into this really nice guy at the University Newspaper and now we've been married for eleven years.

Answer 5

You say that you believe God has someone for you. Then why worry?!



Just have fun and live your life. Enjoy what God has given you, and before you know it, you're going to find yourself on the gateway to marriage.



That being said, I need to point out a few things:

- Don't go searching for love: it never works. You get those darn blinders put on and you can't see the person for who he really is

- Don't assume a relationship will end in marriage: Just have some fun! See where God is leading you. Take it slow; there's no need to rush!



It sounds like you're the type of women who doesn't stray from what she believes. Heck, I believe that in the real world you and I would have been friends (I am the exact same, only 4 years older, married and white).



I should note that marriage isn't going to make you happy. If you aren't happy now, marriage isn't going to flip that magic switch and make things better. Love yourself and your situation NOW.



It's like winning the lottery - if you aren't happy with your financal situation now, there's no amount of money that will really make you happy.

Answer 6

Even though I'm a lot younger than you are, I get what you're thinking because sometimes I think about it too. I don't think you should rely on the statistics on the Tyra Banks show. I believe that everyone will experience love sometime during their lives. You said you have a small group of friends. I think expanding your social circle would help a lot. I also think you should just hang around get get to know guys first. You need to establish a loving relationship first before you think about marriage.

Answer 7

Wow, youre only 20! You have your whole life to find Mr Right. I got married at 23 and sometimes wish i hadnt married so young. You are only young once. Enjoy your youth. Get out and start meeting people,join aclub or dance class do the online dating thing. Put yourself out there. Being Christian doesnt mean ýou should just sit back and wait for a sign from god. Get out there and look for what you want. Good luck!!

Answer 8

Everything you just listed about the person you are would be a dream woman for any man. In college sadly, most men aren't looking for that stable relationship. Dating with the intentions of marriage are not what they are after. I stay to strong true to yourself and your beliefs and before you know you'll be head over heels in love and won't be looking back at the times you felt lonely. It'll happen, just you wait and see.

Answer 9

You don't drink or party. Which is strictly prohibited in the Bible...where? It isn't and the truth is there are a lot of parties and social occasions (usually not sober occasions) at university where young people meet each other. If you're missing out on that because of your ideology (which doesn't even stipulate what you may think it does), I really feel sorry for you. That isn't to say you won't meet someone...in fact, you certainly will...Good Luck!

Answer 10

First off, I applaud you for not sacraficing your morals for a man. Secondly, I would like you to know that God has a plan for everyone and true love is almost certainly in his plan. You cannot, however, wait for God to do all the work. Instead, you must step out of your small group of friends and introduce yourself to other people. You cannot expect different results for the same procedure. Surround yourself with good people who share the same values and morels as you and you will be sure to find the man of your dreams.



God Bless and good luck.

Answer 11

GIRL I FELT THE SAME WAY BEFORE I MET MY CURRENT BF!!



ok, so i never got a bf until high school. then it has been nonstop bfs. never really loved any of them. i thought i did, but i didnt. i cared for them, possibly infatuated and got over it. you know? then i met this guy, unbelievable. kind of daring, really sweet, and for some reason i felt like he was worth a shot. we went out... and the rest is history.



now im preg, we plan on marrying soon. im also going to move in with him soon. its perfect.



im 20 y/o too. im not overweight as well, i dont think im terrifyingly hideous all the time. haha, what can i say? i am my own worst critic. you just stay you. honestly, god has a plan for all of us. he does, and mine has came into play. just wait for yours. you seem sweet, just give it time. maybe you arent supposed to find someone in college, maybe it is after college, or when you start your career.



relax and let it ride girl. honestly, it will be worth it.

Answer 12

Don't worry. God will have someone for you. my parents lived one hour away from each other and never met and God sent them half way across the world to meet and get married. If you trust God, He'll give you hope and you dont have to worry. And it's ok that you'r not getting married now cause most guys aren't completely mature at the age of 20.

Answer 13

Well, what percentage of other races of women are single? by single they mean not married, but they could be dating, correct? I think maybe the numbers might be similar with other women, but maybe black women are just a little higher. Tyra needs to say things to get ratings, so she puts a spin on certain things, and, knowing her audience, she brings race into many of her topics. I don't think you should worry about this very much.

Answer 14

all you need is faith in God. I'm still waiting too..

I wish one day to be taken away, saved and married.. never to be alone, a companion through happiness and troubles.. another 1/2...

but you must always remember.. we are blessed, and I'm sure you know that..

the only thing we're granted in life is choice, and death..



if you see someone you might like.. go up, talk.. chat.. put yourself out there, and pray.



Either way, you can be a best friend, and a companion..

and you might end up falling in love with a dear friend..

Good luck to us all, especially you..

I feel your uncertainty (spelling?)

Answer 15

You can't figure out what will happen to you from a tv show. And those statics are usually wrong. You need to relax and wait for the right moment. It will happen if you want it. It has nothing to do with your age, race, or anything else. There are people who are in their 70s and getting married and you know that any race can be married. There are no limitations anymore. Don't let a tv show rattle you.

Answer 16

Sometimes what you've been looking for all along shows up in front of you as soon as you stop looking! You're still young, and it will happen for you! Don't spend all these great years worrying about the future. If you feel like you're having trouble meeting someone, maybe ask some friends to set you up with one of thier friends or try a trusted matching site like match.com or eharmony.com. Good luck :)

Answer 17

Meh. Statistics don't mean that much. Even if 70% don't get something, that doesn't mean you have to be part of the 70%. You sound as though you have your head on straight, and have some real goals. You will fulfill whatever God's plan is for you - you just need to open yourself to accept whatever that plan may be.

Answer 18

If you wait in Lord, not only you will get married, but you you will married the right man!



I got married when I was 26 and beleive me, it was worth to wait, my wife is the most amazing woman and above everything she loves the Lord.



Sometimes I used to feel like I was wasting my time and my youth just like you, but now when I look back and I see my life and other people lifes that choose other ways, I have to praise and thanks God for helping me to wait because he gave me much more than I ever dream!

Answer 19

Stop looking so far deep into it. Everyone is different, and their mates come at different times. You are only 20. You have your whole life ahead of you. If you do not have a bad attitude, then you will not fall into that 70 percent.

Answer 20

You'll get married some day just relax. I found the love of my life when i gave up on looking for love. You sound like a wonderful and beautiful person and when you do get married your husband will be a very very lucky man

Answer 21

You can't just keep waiting for Mr. Right. Go out and have a social life, if you already have one, expound it and meet more people. Once you find someone that is decent, set up a date. Just remember, no one is perfect, you might have to settle for less than your requirements of a man.

Answer 22

If you mean elementary education, by getting a teaching degree...or something, then maybe when you finish college and find a school to teach at, maybe there's another lonely man. :)



And why should your race affect the statistics of marriage? People don't believe in interracial babiez.

Answer 23

You sound like you have so much to offer... but not just to a man. Live for you and for you only. Don't focus on what you don't have and think about all of the fantastic things you do have... you are a smart, respectable woman. Continue to keep your values and do not let anyone ever compromise this!!!! GL to you!!!

Answer 24

Love doesn't focus on color.

You'll find it.

Possibly try being more outgoing. Sit with a guy you think is good looking. Get to know some more people.

You'd be surprised at the results.

Answer 25

It is ok to cut loose a little at 20 years old. Don't go out with complete losers, it isn't that hard. Just make sure you are on birth control and use protection.



**Don't worry about getting married unless you are over 35 or so.

Answer 26

there is someone out there for EVERYONE. you will find someone i promise. i admire that you are sticking to your ideals and arent going to change just so you can find a guy. just keep on staying true to yourself and living life and eventually the perfect guy will come along. i wish you luck in your search and hope this brings you hope and encourages you not to give up!

Answer 27

you are young and have many years of life ahead of you. YES you will get married if you want to and if you get out there and work, go to school, participate in hobbies etc to meet people. If you are highly intelligent then I recommend you go to grad school where you will find the best guys!!!

Answer 28

That statistic is a bunch of bull crap. It doesn't matter what race you are, you can get married. You can't always believe what tyra says, she's in her own crazy world.

Answer 29

If you truly believe in god that he will give you your soul mate then he will and he will do it when he is ready don't worry it might take awhile but god does things for a reason...be patient it will come...when you least expect it.



Good Luck!

Answer 30

the dudes at ur skool must be into party hard smoking drinking chicks, but God does have someone for u. just stay strong and find a guy who digs that kinda thing. its better to be laid back and smart than drunk chicks hop i helped!! : )

Answer 31

I have the same problem. My cousin did too and she actually found a nice guy that had the same beliefs as her. So, you do have hope to get married. She did

Answer 32

Be patient! You sound like one hell of a catch: Intelligent, sweet, honest, beautiful, etc. Finish college first, then dedicate your time into finding your knight and shining armor. :)



Education first, love second.

Answer 33

you have no chance if you dont go to places where there are men, unless your lesbian, you cant meet a guy without going to a place where guys are at like a bar or a party. At the very least youll get laid

Answer 34

most guys like me just want to have a woman to have a good heart mind and soul. you sound like a a good person with your head on right so just keep being you and stay good

Answer 35

Well, you shouldn't believe everything you hear on that show. A lot of it is crap. As long as you're yourself around guys you're interested in & you make sure to look nice, you should be fine. I wish the best of luck to you! Good luck! :)

Answer mine? :)

https://answersrip.com/question/index?qid=20081001172407AAMJzfa

Answer 36

Since you are a fellow christain, let me just say that it WILL happen, but in God's time, not ours. Be patient and obedient and God will bless you. God Bless.

Answer 37

dont worry ur still young ull find sm1 and dont listen 2 tyra lol

Answer 38

i know plenty of married black people, thats just a statistic, you are an individual!

Answer 39

thers diffrnt groups u can join in college, u might find sombdy there

Answer 40

you know, i know how you feel. if you feel like meeting a friend let me know. you seem like a nice person that i would love to date.

Answer 41

you should really just tae your time.

true lov ewill find you.

it never helps if you are looking for it.

just take some time.

i'm sure god has someone for you.

Answer 42

you ill find somewon you be you self and you will find them you want to talk more ten you email me at [e-mail]

Answer 43

of course just have some self confidence in yourself

Answer 44

do you want to be happy or married. They are two different things

Answer 45

First of all stop watching Tyra......

Answer 46

god has saved someone for you and when you don't know it you'll be getting married

Answer 47

haha i was just about to say that, about the match.com thing

Answer 48

*bangs head against desk*

Answer 49

relax, you have plenty of time..............you are only 20!

Answer 50

will you marry me?

Answer 51

well try match.com