When a man "talks to a woman"?

Question

I have been married 12 years. We have been happy for the most part. Now he is talking 5 days a week with his ex fiancee. I told him this bothers me but he gets mad. He has no friends and enjoys her chats.If I say it bothers me he keeps doing it, he said he'd stop to spare my feelings then he sneaks it. I finally just told him it was okay so he would not lie to me. When is enough enough? He gets PO'd if my ex was to call me and we never had sex like him and his ex did. Any ideas why men lie about talking to other women and hide chat emails,etc. from a wife who has always allowed him to do whatever?

Answer 1

sounds like he needs a chat with dr phil...

I though of two things as I read ur question...

1. This has happened to me...

2. Give him a taste of his own mediciane

Men are secretive by nature I think, over the stupidest things, almost like children...If your not ok with him talking to her, then u need to sit him down and tell him..NO I'm not ok with this, and if u keep doing this and talk to her behind my back then my choice is clear because u have decided what is more important, and u have no one to blame but yourself... That is so disrepectful and hurtful to you his wife. Men shouldnt have friends or be friends with someone he was intimate with before you, there relationship was basted on that...dont fall for the common line men use which is "your just insecure"...its not true any women would be like...No way! and for that matter if hes doing nothing wrong.."so he says" tell him to talk infront of you only, and if he can or claims ur being too ni=oisy u got ur answer to what there talking about..men and exs dont mix..Be strong,cause if u think telling him this will make him angry and leave then he was gonna do it reguardless and y waste time...check out dr. phil. com hes a good one! Best hopes and prayers with you...oh by the way..I'm not sure if ur religious, but also tel him this , reguardless of what it is if its compermising ur relationship, then he should put his own feelings aside and be there for the marriage!!!

Answer 2

Fantastic question Mark! I so agree with you, of course I am older, so I prefer a man, a real man. But I have a feeling that those days are gone, at least for now. Somewhere between the 70's when I got married and the current day the boys as they grow up seem to be coddled more by Mommy, and then even after they leave the house, they seem to turn and ask Mommy to do so much for them, that they haven't a clue how to stand on their own two feet. I think a lot of it has to do with in the "older" days, you registered for the draft, served your country, and came home as "men". I can only hope that the real men return - quickly! It is ok to be caring, and feeling, but can't you be men at the same time?

Answer 3

ur such an understanding wife 2 allow him 2 do these things eversince. i guess he's taking advantage of ur trust coz maybe he thinks that ur always there 2 understand his actions.



if i were u, i wud never allow him 2 chat or flirt w/some girls online & d more i wud never allow him 2 keep in touch w/his ex.



Even if she's already married. It will definitely bother & hurt me.



If ur hubby respects u & loves u, he will never try 2 do things that will hurt u. How can u b happy w/this kind of set up???



Talk 2 him one last tym & give him some choices.. Tell him that ur willing 2 leave him if he continues 2 behave that way. If he just ignore u, then pack up ur things & leave. Let him b happy w/his ex.. Maybe she's giving him some kind of satisfaction or whatsoever..



He's definitely not worthy of u.

Answer 4

Men are weird, if you told him that it bothered you (which i can understand) and he keeps doin it then he's blowing you off. If he gets mad wen you talk about it to him, then maybe just maybe somthin goin on. If a guy feels he has to hide something then 9-10 its b/c its somethin tat he should be hiding.

Answer 5

i dont know what to do about him (from a wife who has always allowed him to do whatever?) but i,m looking for you...come here