The decision whether happy hour involves all co workers, male and female alike, is not yours. It seems like it is going to happen whether you or I like it or not. So, let's talk about two things here.
Your husband invited you. He obviously has nothing to hide and I do not believe you were inferring that he did.
This female coworker who brought up distasteful topics is just some woman who has zero social grace. No one but she is responsible for her behavior and should not be a reflection on the rest of the group. Ask yourself this question: would it have been distasteful if some off colored topic was initiated by a man, instead? I would say that your answer would be yes, correct? So, this is not necessarily a female coworker question, but the subject of off colored conversations, perhaps.
The phrase "out with the guys" got blown out of the window when your husband invited you to come along, so you should have realized that woman would also be there. So, I am sort of confused about the real issue here.
It is not unheard of that a whole office goes off for happy hour. Just go and enjoy yourself and totally ignore anyone, male or female, who cannot have social grace.
TO YOUR ADDED DETAILS: obviously your relationship with him has matured since you had that one job where you were invited out and decided to stay home.