My marriage is so frustrating?

Question

We ve been married for 5 years. Right after the 2nd year our marriage has been boring, routine and stale. Coming from religious families and having to deal with intense social pressure i still stick to my husband. Our sex life is boring and routine, initiated by me only to be rejected multiple times. My husband takes his work very seriously and is stressed all the time. Ive tried talking multiple times over this to no avail, tried being incredibly supportive, no difference. We have barely any responsibilities yet he lets work take the first seat i left my modelling career to settle in the middle east and have barely any projects here. Im clueless what to do i still love him more than anything in this life but this boring marriage is taking a toll on my mental health.. what should i do

Answer 1

Marriage is hard I'm not married but I know people in 20+ years of marriage and its hard. They say things too about their marriage but never do anything but I don't think that's a way to live. I mean life is just way to short to be bored. When you are about to leave this world and you look back at the life you lived what will you say? That you wasted it because you love your husband that ignores you for his job?



I get it people have their dream job I totally understand that but it should have been his dream to have you when he married you. If he won't listen to you or care how you feel then he obviously doesn't respect you. If you can honestly say you gave it your all to fix your marriage and it didn't help it one bit than I'm sorry to say it's no longer a marriage you have made compromises but he has not.



It's time you make yourself happy because he obviously is doing what's best for him and not what's best for you guys as a team

Answer 2

If youre husband is that stressed with work, why doesnt he take a break? Go on vacation together to get that spark back and communicate again! You both need to work on this together. Work shouldnt come first, it should always come last when youre married no matter how hard he is working and making money. I am sure hes making enough already and can pay the bills just fine. What is he so scared of? Hes not going to fail you, or himself. He needs to remind himself of that When someone is taking work that seriously thats when they need a time out (maybe in the sex department) and you need to speak up. Its boring and routine because you both made it this way. All that needs to stop and change things up. Take a vacation wherever it may be! Just do it! It helps many couples get away from life's stresses and come back again renewed and refreshed. I dont know why your husbands not thinking about that? Life is too short and it is flying by. He'll miss out on enjoying life. Remind him of that.

Answer 3

We have been married 49 yrs. Most of our sex has been of the fun and playful kind, not the candlelight and music kind.

Think outside the bedroom. Next time you take a shower, wear just the towel around the house for a while. See how long it takes before he pulls it off. My wife wears just a Tshirt that comes to mid butt. (drives me crazy) cook breakfast in just panties on a day that he goes to work (or golfing, fishing, etc). He will think about that all day. On a day when he is home, do the same, then sit on his lap and feed him his breakfast. Snuggle up on the couch when he is watching TV, then start unbuttoning something on you or on him. Have a naked video night where you both sit naked on the couch, popcorn and drinks, and watch something you like (doesn't have to be porn). Have naked breakfast on Saturday mornings. Don't forget car sex. Scout out a place when you are alone, then one night when you are driving home, say, "Turn here." and guide him to the spot.. Pull out some battery powered candles for the dashboard. We had a book called "101 sexual positions" and a jar with pieces of paper numbered 1 to 101. We would pick a number and try that position. Have sex in every room, on, under, or beside every piece of furniture. Try sex on the stairs. After you have done a few of these, challenge him to come up with something. But most of all HAVE FUN!!!!

Answer 4

Sounds like you are putting an awful lot of pressure on your marriage to make you happy. Marriage is just one part of a whole person's life. Did you not have any other goals for your life other than to get married and live happily ever after?

Answer 5

It is impossible to change another person. Your husband sounds like a workaholic as are many men and women in the world today. He is finding his own sense of meaning and value in this world to come from his work.



You seem to be looking for your marriage to provide YOUR sense of meaning and value in life. The reality is that you must make careful choices and work to create your own meaningful life. Look to your own career prospects, or volunteer/community service, or further education, or create a network of close friends to share life with. You can do this. It is not dependent on your husband or any other human being.

Answer 6

Many married couples are busy with work and children, and they may lose the romance in their lives. Your husband's work is important to him. His work shouldn't be more important than you. He is stressful, and he is not romantic. You can do things to help him relax. Give him a back massage sometimes. Rub lotion on his feet. You and your husband should do romantic things. Have romantic dinners at home. Put candles on the table. Play romantic music, and you and your husband can dance. You should do things that interest you. Take a class (painting, photography, creative writing, etc.). If you like reading, you can join a book club. You and your husband should spend time together.

Answer 7

If your married to a Muslim be very weary of ending up dead or in jail. Marriage is a journey, surely you knew what you were signing up for inregard to career etc. Adults do not have to be entertained constantly. Maybe you married too young. Get involved in your community, or passions. Pray about this and understand there are many hills and valleys in marriage. I am sorry he is not pleasing in the bedroom. Teach him.

Answer 8

If you intend to stay with him then you have to find something to add life to your Life. You can tell him that things need to change, but he may not agree so then you have to be prepared to make your own changes or leave (if it's that important to you).



You have limited control over your marriage, because you share that control with someone else. You have total control over your personal life though, so maybe that's where you need to focus to get your excitement or fun (within appropriate boundaries).

Answer 9

It sounds like you both have an honesty and a communication gap. Unless you both sit down with no distractions and openly talk it will just continue and possibly end in a divorce. I have been there but my wife was a cheater so it ended period !

Answer 10

Get a hobby. Do some volunteer work. Your marriage isn't boring. You are bored. There is a difference.

Answer 11

Make an effort to meet other women there and develop a social network outside your marriage.

Answer 12

Marriage is hard and I would recommend that you guys go to marriage counseling.

Answer 13

Call me!

I make a great Side Dude. No strings attached, I'll make you feel like the most wonderful woman in the world...all that because you said you were a model. So take a break from that trophy chaser of a husband, and give me a call from time to time. I'll save your marriage.

A happy wife= a happy husband.

A happy husband= a happy home.

Answer 14

When I'm bored, I find something interesting to do. If you can't do the same, you must be creatively impaired. It sounds like your biggest problem is that you apparently believe it's your husband's job to make YOUR life interesting. It isn't. It's your job. And that goes for all facets - if your sex life is boring, do something interesting, and if your husband won't participate, do something interesting alone.

Answer 15

Step 1 - Be your own person. Have hobbies and/or work. Take care of yourself. The only way to be bored when you are your own person is to be boring.



Step 2 - Encourage husband to be his own person. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. If you are your own person you will be able to handle it either way.

Answer 16

Talk to each other and figure out what to do.



Get a new job/take up a hobby.



Go to counseling together.

Answer 17

I suggest you get registered at a dating site for married people

Answer 18

Leave. You only live once and if you stay with this awful man you will never live at all.

Answer 19

Your marriage should never be boring you simply just picked the wrong guy im just being honest. I dont know you neither your life or this situation but im telling you if you truly loved this guy nothing at all would phase you guy's relationship. Ive had stale relationships before and i knew if i were to marry the guy even if i told them i wanted to, it would be boring and dumb. Try to spice things up i guess or get a divorce, thats would i would do in your situation.

Answer 20

Aww, you're a little bored huh? It must be your husband's fault. After all, it's a husband's responsibility to keep his wife fully entertained and happy at all times. It must be so tough to have a husband dedicated to supporting you and building a career for the future rather than keeping you occupied with bright lights and quick random motion.



And having to leave your "modeling career", that's rough. I guess the Kmart ladies casual ad can find another "model" to fill the void, but how will the mall "fashion show" ever find another girl?

Answer 21

Your husband sounds like a responsible,loving and hardworker man. You are lucky!! Go and kiss him,.tell him "I am lucky to have a wonderful husband like you".

Answer 22

I say make friends with a hot women bring her home let ur hubby pound her into next week take pics make him say stuff like watch *****, I am the king u will do what I say. Make him say things to make you look like y are in a stressful life don't let him *** till he threatens to hurt you bad then divorce him for domestic violence and adultery take all his money then come here and ride my face..

Answer 23

You had been neglect by your husband

its like living with a co loc

If you can get a divorce ; get one



There no reason for your husband to be so cold with you ;; but maybe its part of your culture n;; is it ??

Answer 24

Yet he two time