Question:
My friend needs advice genuinely,who loves married man n thy wer in rlation for v long time,but now whn his?
ANUPAMA
2013-09-03 10:27:45 UTC
wife got hint,he imidiatly tok his wifes side n whn time came to prove his love for my friend he went into his wifes side without caring of my v sentimental friend whos single unmarried n truly stil loves him.he used to tel my friend to get married but whn he loves my friend how can he tel her,was the question that:-)my friend asked him.now he has shifted to some other place wher his wife has takn him.wht is love thn?why is always a gal v senimental n true to love n ready to do anythg for love n why not man?does this mean that this guy never loved my friend.my friend is gng thru suicidal tendencies coz she totaly broken n unexpected.i just wan to knw did he really lov my friend or all guys are lik dis?n he stil calls her daily.pls guide coz i tried to console n convinc her but dnt knw myself wht to say whn she asks if he really loved her?pls guide
Nine answers:
Malini
2013-09-04 20:52:02 UTC
Getting into the life of a married man is never safe. He has used her. Beer to realize now and move away.
?
2013-09-05 08:14:31 UTC
If he still calls your friend frequently, I would say he still holds much affection & concern for her. If he didn't care, he would not call or contact her.



What your friend needs to understand is that he is married. This means it was a forbidden relationship between this man and your friend to begin with. His ultimate duty is to his wife and family above all else. There are only two things that can happen here. He will have to choose which side to be on, your friend's or his wife's. He chose the wife. An honorable man would not have an affair outside of his marriage, he would only be with his wife, and not others. In cultures where multiple wives are allowed, the FIRST WIFE has much power to influence the husband because she is the first. So all other wives that are brought into the family unit will be subordinate to her (below her in status and power). I don't know what culture your friend is from.



Also, to keep a family together, a man will often stay with the wife to protect his reputation, his money & assets from divorce, his children's emotional well-being, and status. Divorce is an ugly thing, and can ruin people financially, their reputations, devastate children, and cause much conflict in the extended family. Many married men will have affairs if they think the wife will not find out. But don't EVER believe that they will leave the wife for good until the divorce is settled by law. Arranged marriages are the hardest of all to break, because this culture will cause problems for the man's reputation. As he accepted to marry her, he also accepted the duty and responsibility to stand by her and the family.



In any culture or circumstance, the chances of the man leaving the wife are few and difficult. It's easier to stay with the wife than to risk the break from her. It is also just a way for men to have affairs and never have to commit to the other woman. While his heart may be hurt, he must do what his duty is-and that is side with wife & family. A difficult lesson your friend has learned, and she must move on. In the future, she should never get involved with another married man, or risk this emotional pain again. He was never hers, he belongs to his wife, regardless of where his heart lies.... unless he divorces the wife.



Now, think of this: if he found it ok to cheat on his wife, why would your friend still want him? Could she ever trust him not to cheat on her too? She is foolish to think that he is trustworthy, honest, and honorable if he ignores the bonds of marriage to be with another woman. The only way he can prove his love for her is to divorce his wife, or let your friend go to persue happiness for herself. Marriage is supposed to be sacred and pure for a husband and wife. He desecrated his marriage by bringing another woman into his life, his marriage, and is wrong for doing so. Your friend is the one who is hurt and feels rejected... and this is how almost all affairs will and do end up. It is not worth it. Best thing to do is to forget him, don't communicate with him, and live her life. Find a man without a wife or girlfriend, and who will be trustworthy, and deserves her heart. The married man doesn't deserve her, he has a wife already, and chose the wife over her. That is a clear sign that this was not meant to be. He may love her, but not enough to choose her instead of the wife. He fears risking everything, and finds it easier to stay with his wife... which, like I said, is his duty unless divorced.
High Roller
2013-09-03 10:55:21 UTC
When a woman gets involved with a married man, she takes her chances. He may, or may not choose her over his wife. This guy may have cared for your friend, but he didn't love her, so when his wife found out about the affair, he broke it off. Your friend isn't innocent in this. She knew the man was married, yet she continued in a relationship with him anyway. That was the wrong thing to do and she certainly knows that. You don't mess around with another woman's husband and then get upset when he dumps you. Your friend needs to stop taking the man's calls and get on with her life. He's married!
?
2013-09-03 13:30:06 UTC
this guys sounds like a hole and shrewd manupilator ,i can understand that many indian men are very intelligent shrewd liars who emotionally blackmail girls ffor nasty stuff thats why theres this law

your

friend can file a case against him of cheating and rape if he had sex with her on pretex of marriage

so this will totally defame the guy ( your friend shouldnt marry such a man though evn if he divorces his wife)

ask your friend to stop thinking from heart and put her mind straight ,,guys arnt emotional beings atleast likes of him arnt
2013-09-03 10:45:14 UTC
she need to come out that relationship. there are lot of good men she will come across. she should know this love won't stay long if the guy is already married. even if he leaves or say he leave his wife and come to your friend, I won't say that will last long. ask her to move on. lot of better things to enjoy in this life instead of wasting on one person who is not reliable.
?
2013-09-03 11:10:56 UTC
She should move on. Are you texting this? Tried to get through this question and i'm usually not picky but my eyes were crossing trying to understand the choppy miss pelt words...
Asha Thammanna
2013-09-03 13:09:17 UTC
The guys an ******* and, the girl should be ashamed for going after a married man.

there is nothing you can do to help her.



how would you like if another girl comes in your hubbys life
Kathleen
2013-09-03 10:29:38 UTC
He's MARRIED. Leave him alone.



If he was a good person, he would never have cheated on his wife.
?
2013-09-03 16:13:18 UTC
Horrible writing !!!! Im not reading it or answering this. Are you texting this?


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