Can my child's father be granted full custody?

Question

I have a 3 year old boy who has lived with me since birth. His father and I were never married. He recently served me paperwork to get full custody of my child. Will a judge really grant a father full custody of a child?

Background info: The father and his parents have been watching my son since birth while I am at work and school. We both lived in the same city so I dropped off my son at his grandparents home every morning and picked him up. My sons father has been unemployed for the last few years and his parents are retired so I thought it would be best for my son to stay with them instead of being in daycare. A few months ago I had to move for a new job which is 50 miles from my sons fathers. During the transition to a new home and job, I allowed my son to stay with his father during the week and I have had him on the weekends. The main reason for this was because the father is unemployed and he will not allow me to put my son in daycare if I was to have him during the week. We currently have a parenting plan for 1 week on/1 week off and he is supposed to be paying 60% of all childcare costs plus child support. Of course he refuses to pay the child care costs because he wont let my son go to childcare. He also has not been paying child support, which I was fine with as he is taking care of our child more right now.

I dont have money for a lawyer and he has had multiple family members write witness statements on how great of a father he is and how I 'agreed' to allow my son to live with his father. But they don't tell the entire story. I only agreed because he didn't give me another option other than quit my job (or not work for the week I had my son, which I cant do).

We have court next week. How does the process work? Will I be able to tell my story to a judge, or will he just read the paperwork prior and make a decision? Can they really give the father full custody because he doesn't have a job and stays home all day?

Answer 1

Maria, don't worry about loosing your son! A mother has to be "very bad" as a person to loose custody of their child. This you are NOT! I would be willing to say it's going to end up staying the SAME exact way it is at the present. I truly believe you have NOTHING to worry about as you ARE one GOOD logical mother. Honestly, try not to worry. Yes it's easy to say, but then realistically consider ALL the facts! I've been "preaching" to my 3 adult children that 99.9% of what we worry about never comes into being. They too have found it to be true. Apply this to you're present life, I feel it also applies here in your case too. The very best to you...:)

Answer 2

if he has no job then what is the problem right now when the kid is 3 years old, to be with unemployed dad during the week, and with working mom (you) on the weekends?



It gives the kid and dad time together AND saves you from having to pay for daycare. If he is unemployed and willing to care for the child, I would be amazed that any judge would grant custody to you during the week where daycare would be required.



Since what I described above is how you said the agreement has been working out, regardless of what you both signed, it is not how real life has played. Courts weigh a LOT if any routine deviation to the agreement has been ongoing,



Until the child enters school age, or dad gets a job, the custody should stay as is. Dad during the week and you on the weekends.



Revisit the custody once the child starts school. Make sure to do it since that is a change in circumstance.



Add: to answer your specific question, no. You will both probaly be granted joint physical custody.

Answer 3

The judge will hear your side of the story. Normally a judge will not take a child from the mother unless the father can prove you are an unfit mother. You are the one who works and goes to school. He does not work so you don't have a thing to worry about. The judge may grant split custody which is what you are already doing now anyway.

Answer 4

Well speaking as a father who did get full custody of both my daughters...yes it is possible and I was active duty military at the time. It is highly unlikely that a judge will grant sole custody to either parent except to protect the child from harm. Him not having a job doesn't speak to his ability to provide proper care for your son. Unless you're leaving somthing out of your question I wouldn't worry too much. You'll get your chance to speak to the judge.

Answer 5

There will be a custody hearing. A judge would not just grant a decision like that without meeting with both parents.

Answer 6

No, a judge will hear both sides and decides what's best for the child. He's an ******* of a father btw.

Answer 7

children born out of wedlock are always given to their mothers(sole custody)!

Answer 8

Yep, it's called equality

welcome to the new age