Women how do you deal with having to settle with a loser ?

Question

Apparently there are a lot of losers out there according to women, maybe half of men, maybe more. How do you women who arent in the 7 - 10 range deal with having to settle for a "loser" ? Do you target only men you deem good material anyway even if they are married, do you just stay singel do you get into a relationship and if you are into a relationship with a loser how do you endure it ?

Answer 1

I think there is no way you should ever settle for something you would consider a loser. Now, you may have to adjust your expectations. Most of us - male & female - want to be with the best looking, most fit person. There are a lot of losers in that category too. Once you realize it's what is on the inside that really counts - you can skip all the losers and find the person that is best for you - whether they fall into the 7-10 range or not.

Answer 2

Well first of all I don't date losers, never have and never will. If I am dating someone who I believe is a loser, what does that say about me. I'm not saying that somewhere in the dating process I discover that they are a loser, but I sure wouldn't even start up a relationship with some who I deemed a loser. Once I found out that he was a loser, wouldn't take me long to move on.



I would never target a married man. That would make me a loser. Targeting a loser. Not for me.

Red

Answer 3

When I was a young woman I felt that I had to be a 10 in order to find a man who would be right for me. But the truth is, even someone who thinks they are only a 2 is attractive to someone. Some men find fat women sexy. Some men like brown hair, some like blonde, some like blue eyes, some like green. Some men like a woman with an attitude and a lot to say, others want a woman who doesn't talk a lot or is really easy-going. There is someone out there for everyone. And as a woman, I find different things attractive than you might. I found out that there is no perfect person, and yet I didn't settle for a loser. I chose someone who made me happy and someone that I made happy too. He had to have what I wanted in a man, as well as a physical attraction for me, or I never would have married him.

P.S. A man who is married and is willing to have an extra-marital affair because some woman thought he was good material is actually NOT good material. If he is willing to sneak out on his wife, he will be willing to sneak out on her eventually.

Answer 4

Why would you be with a guy you think is a loser... The only way that would happen is if you think that YOU are a loser, and you can't get any better. :( Find a guy who you think is great! a 6 to some people might be a 10 to you, just do what makes you happy, but you have to feel like you are 10 to that guy too, even if you feel like a 6 to someone else....

Answer 5

What makes you think that only women in the 10 category do not get losers and women in the 7 - 10 do? Also, you did not explain your definition of a loser. From what you wrote I can bet your definition of a loser is someone without much money. Just a guess.

Answer 6

It depends on how you define loser. Usually a loser to me means he's not worth my time because his neg qualities outweigh the good. In this case, it's definitely better to stay single and with time you'll find someone who IS worth your time and energy and who makes you happy.



However, I dated a guy for 2 years who had a mediocre job, a 6 year old son he saw 3 times a month, a small simple apartment and no car. Many (including my mother) would deem him a loser. But I loved that boy like there was no tomorrow and he gave me everything he could emotionally and for that reason, he was all I needed and he made made me happy. Love is all you need.

Answer 7

You don't have to settle for anything. You just drop that loser like a hot rock and move on. be patient and wait for the right person to come along for you. even the not 7-10 girls don't have to settel for a loser. I am 14 and I am like a 4 but my girlfirend is like a 9.

Answer 8

I was in a relationship with a really big LOSER several years ago and I just dealt with it for a little over a year, and let me tell u it was the toughest but painful year of my life, but I'll tell u in the end I didn't deal with it I got out and now I am happily married to a wonderful man and have 2 beautiful children and I love my life everday!

Answer 9

You need to redefine "loser" and look more deeply into the person's character. My wife is very surface-oriented, she's good looking and has a sports & money family. I'm sort of a geek but i have a lot of interpersonal strengths, patience, and family values. When her parents visit, they turn on the football game. When my parents visit, they play games with the kids.



My wife doesn't like to recognize my strengths, in fact she basically says my family is defective. What she means is, she's scared to realize there is a lot more to life than sports and money. It hurts to be on the losing end, but that's the way it is.



If I gave you all the details, you would see how truly sick it is. I give everything I have and she just takes and takes because she feels she is entitled because she's superior.

Answer 10

I am with someone that I love very much, that is not a loser. Even if I were single, I would only seek single men that I feel is compatiable with my personality and have simular values and wants in life.



Never settle for less, even if means being alone, the right one will come along, you might just have to w a i t

Answer 11

Don't ever settle for a loser. I had many many loser boyfriends, but when I met my husband to be - I realized that ALL guys really arent losers, because he wasnt. I think you have to date around...probably a lot to be able to find a good guy. But there ARE good guys out there. Never settle for anything less.

Answer 12

I know exactly what you are talking about.

My solution is simple: Never settle. Why should I? I can pay my own bills, and I am financially independent. I don't need the extra baggage or stress in my life.

The ONLY thing annoying is that relatives and parents like to "push" me into finding somebody to settle down with. So I move out the house or stop this family gathering non sense.

Now I am dating whomever I like to date, and have the time of my life.

Answer 13

I personally don't settle for anything. And while it's easy for me to talk, women don't have to be that hot to get a great guy. Most guys seem to think I'm good looking enough, but I know plenty of guys who are with better looking girls who would much rather be with me. It's more about attitude than just looks. Further more, I think that most guys become winners if treated properly and supported by a woman who understands and honestly respects herself and men for what they are, and not just what she wants them to be.



If a girl wants to get a great guy I'd give them 2 pieces of advice.



1 - Hit the gym and the salad bar.

2 - Stop being controlling and trying to turn men into choir boys. Guys put up with it and pretend to keep us happy, but they hate living on a short leash. If you get all anal about porn for example, he'll look twice as much and just hide it and lie and resent you for it.



Do these two things and you'll have plenty of guys to choose from.

Answer 14

I dated a woman who definitely was only a 5, but she could land men who were definitely 8-10s as far as societal standards goes.



She was extremely good at finding diamonds in the rough and bolstering their confidence so that they fulfilled their potential.



But, you're right -- most women marry losers. Also, most women have affairs or at least think seriously about it. Think the two go hand in hand?

Answer 15

I left a loser cos he kept lying to me. Now I am with some one I'd consider a 10 ... but then again there is no such thing as a flawless man .. all marriage takes a working on and it's a never ending process. We keep learning, forgiving , nurturing and loving =]

Answer 16

I guess this depends on your definition of "loser". If you are strictly talking about looks.... well i guess everyones opinion is different. But if you are looking to settle down with someone looks aren't everything. Looks are the first impression yes but I've met plenty of good looking men who have the personality that is not complimentary to their looks. Its like when you get a present its not the box that it comes in that you are interested in its whats inside!!!

Answer 17

There should be no such thing as settling. If a person doesn't go out there and get the type of person they want and/or think they should have, whatever type of relationship they're in is their fault. No one's perfect so the question of what's considered settling may vary. However any woman or man who feels they've settled, deserve whatever type of situation they feel they're stuck in.

Answer 18

Don't settle for a loser, you're better off single. Less frustration in your life. The right one comes along eventually.

Answer 19

I would stay single rather than settling. The point is not to find just anyone - the point is to find a suitable and compatible partner whom I can count on. If I can't find a partner who meets my needs, I'd much rather be on my own.

Answer 20

Why are you settling for a loser? I don't know how to settle for one, I'm worth way more than that, and I won't accept less!!! You shouldn't either!!!

Answer 21

Some prefer losers.

Answer 22

I would never settle for a loser. If you feel like you need to settle, then that's your low self esteem issue.

Answer 23

I don't settle. I would rather be single the rest of my life then feel like I have to settle for someone. Why should someone get someone like me and then I have to settle? No way!!!

Answer 24

Never ever settle. And remember that one woman's loser just may be another woman's prince.

Answer 25

All men have their good and bad points, same as women. You just do the best you can and try to tolerate the bad.

Answer 26

There aren't very many 10's out there to begin with.... men OR women.

Answer 27

I won't tolerate losers! And neither should you. Get some self esteem lady!

Answer 28

Maybe you should become a lesbian, then you wouldn't have to deal with us loser men....

Answer 29

Well, Cassius, since I OWN my home and OWNED it BEFORE I married him, I guess I just kick his sorry *** the f out. Thats how I deal with it.

Answer 30

Just because i'm not a 10 means I can't land a good man? How sexist.

Answer 31

Never settle. Obviously you think lowly of yourself.

Answer 32

No one should ever settle- everyone should have their own standards and find that ''right'' person for them....who compliment each other.....

Answer 33

most people now a days dont want to be alone so they settle for anything.

Answer 34

I think when one is thinking their partner is a loser, it's time to call it evens--that's no marriage.

Answer 35

You sound pretty bitter. Why don't you stay single until you get your head together.

Answer 36

Is your avatar the spawn of one of these losers and now you're bitter?

Answer 37

stay single, You don't have to settle for anyone.

Answer 38

I torture him untill he wants a divorce, and then i would hook up with someone hotter

Answer 39

WTF kind of question is this? Did you settle for a loser and now you're pissed about it bc your a single mom now?

Answer 40

What?