My husband always makes comments about women on the TV screen?

Question

Just now, he said the girl looked good.

This makes me feel aweful, and I am so tired of these comments.

Why does he do this? I get upset with him every time, he tells me he´s sorry, and the next night, he´s back to doing it again.

Answer 1

Honey all I can say is if he is making that many comments when you are there can you imagine what he says when he watches tv with his friends?? and dont start doing the same thing about the men on tv..because that will give him the excuse to do it more (well YOU do it too)



Tell him you understand there are beautiful girls on tv (and on the streets, train, bus, store, etc.) But you would appreciate he keep his thoughts to himself becasue it is disrespectful to you and makes you feel bad. Dont watch tv with him for awhile...read a book, go for a walk.



Men suck...once i came home and heard my fiancee through the door with his friends looking at all t hese naked women online...they will never be happy with what they have....

Answer 2

I've gotten in trouble for that a bunch of times. Usually I just blurt it out without thinking. Why? Because I get really excited/happy & I have a habit of being blunt in general. BUT doing it daily, or weekly even, is too far. It's more understandable if he's outspoken/blunt about most things. My outbursts are just a word or two. If he's going into detail... then he sounds pretty insensitive. Regardless, I doubt his apologies are sincere due to the frequency (unless he's a sex addict maybe).

Answer 3

he may actually enjoy getting you stirred up. if so, that's pretty thoughtless and a sign of something not so good. next time it happens, maybe you should tell him it hurts your feelings and if he doesn't care about that, then maybe you will do a little looking around too. Don't yell. Say it quietly. I can't imagine why a man would do that anyway. It makes him look like an idiot. Does he think any of those women on tv would wash his stinkin underwear for him or put up with those kinds of comments?? hahaha

Answer 4

I'm sure your husband thinks you "look good" too or he wouldn't have married you! I think the problem lies more with your self image than it does with your husbands comments. If you were secure with yourself the comments wouldn't bother you. I think the main thing here is to keep things in perspective. He's commenting at the "television". It would be foolish to think that after marriage we no longer feel attracted to other people. There's eye candy all over the place and most people (women included) will look at someone who appeals visually to them. Forgive me for being blunt but I think you might be taking this a little more seriously than it has to be. Relax and remember why your husband married you - because he loves you.

Answer 5

you're in an abusive relationship. you're able to attempt to get help for him, in case you an get it. Counseling could be powerful, yet I could ask your self if he might have a hormone imbalance or some thing. perhaps you're able to attempt to e book him to work out an endocrinologist. heavily! yet look, this might't pass on like this; that's in user-friendly terms going to worsen if it would not get addressed. He can not be chuffed, and clearly neither are you able to in this occasion. I advise, c'mon--"returned talker"? as in case you have no longer have been given each magnificent to declare your strategies that he does? it is an rather undesirable problem which could amplify to very undesirable issues. i'm hoping which you will detect a thank you to do away with your self from this environment on a similar time as he works on despite his themes are. in case you compromise for this way of habit now and don't something, then you definately'll in user-friendly terms be making it worse and worse. I empathize and desire which you would be able to artwork this out. the medicine actual are not helping. If he refuses all help, then what are you able to do yet get away? That or go through continuously. that's all as much as you.

Answer 6

Would you rather him being open about what he sees on TV or just ogles and keeps it to himself?



The main point here is that your man, as all men are, is visually aroused. Men enjoy looking at beautiful women, female models. They enjoy porn. Men's brains are wired that way and it is not something you can change.



And he is not doing it to hurt you! You may certainly ask him not to make such comments and he should respect your request and not make such comments. BUT, BUT, do not expect him not to look at beautiful women. It is a bit like your man asking you not to wear make up.



Men are different frm women. Their values are different, they like sports (than women do), they like watching violent movies, they like watching porn. They will check out pretty women in the street and the telly. And you are not going to change that! Ever!



The sooner you accept this truth, the lesser heartache it will be for you.

Answer 7

babe.. he realizes what he's doing every time he does it... he is fully aware of what it does to you, which in my opinion..and I'm sure many others...is very messed up and wrong. He's breaking down your self confidence so he can gain control... you feel crappy about yourself.. you dont think any other guy will want you... and a million more reasons...but the main point is he is doing it on purpose! Intentionally hurting you... bastards I swear...anyway ok...from now on everytime he does it you HAVE to change how you're responding to it... he says "she looks good" you say " yeah if i was a lez i'd tap that" ...couple hours later YOU say " i like his smile/abs/arms/sense of humor/hair" what the hell ever...just make a point to show attraction to these dudes ...just don't let him see it bother you...obviously that isn't working, right? so be like " yeah she is pretty *big smile*" ..eventually he see's it isn't getting to you anymore so why continue? good luck.. dont let that insensitve asshole bring your confidence down.. just from that little picture i can see that you are gorgeous. If for some reason he does not stop... then show your emotions loudly... rip the cord from the back of the tv and tell him to go to hell. <3

Answer 8

It keeps your interest in him .Guys like that keep there woman forever . The nice guys that treat there woman good usually end up with a divorce . Woman have told me that the good guys are to easy and they get board where as the bad guys are a challenge and keep the spark going. Must be true if it was that bad im sure you would be out of there

Answer 9

I understand where your coming from being a woman and having insecurities but this is one of those things that you can cough up to its a guy thing i do it too with my gf (she doesn't mind it she'll point it out for me too except when they are nude then she covers my eyes.) but if it bothers you as much as you say it does you need to talk to him and perhaps consider couples therapy or marriage counseling. Number one reason for divorce communication so i would definitely take this serious and talk about your feelings otherwise things will be hidden and only get worse!

Answer 10

Start commenting on other guys all the time. Every guy looks, so do women, but there is an amount of excess that's rude. Guys who are obsessed are nasty pigs. I used to date a guy whose roommate was OBSESSED with Britney Spears (this was in about 2000/2001 and he was about 25 years old, so he was REAL mature) and sighed every time he heard her name on TV or the radio and had her on his screensaver. He was constantly saying things about other women in front of his girlfriend (now wife, poor girl). He made a comment to me one time, "you know, if you would start like, working out a lot and get all hot and skinny, you know lose about 20 pounds, you could probably be in Playboy because you have a really pretty face." He was serious. I only weighed about 140 then, but I looked about 120 because I have a lot of muscle, and I'm over 5'5". This guy was one of those puney nerd types. The kicker? When I got offended, by BF got mad at ME for being rude to his friend! Anyway, he wasn't even by BF and I was uncomfortable.



Like I said, it's OK to an extent, but when it's constantly happening, it's rude and hurtful (I guess for an adolescent or teenage boy, it's normal, though, but not for a mature man). A psychologist explained it to me once. Men who constantly do things like that or go to strip clubs a lot or are in love with porn and obsess about hot women often feel bad about themselves and feel like they can't please women. Maybe because they have this little fantasy running in their minds that these women want them. I don't know, but he said that's what it is. He also said, "maybe their mommies didn't breastfeed them". I think that one may be a stretch, but there is research on psychological effects of breastfeeding and not breastfeeding. Next time, instead of complaining to your husband (it'd be nice if that's all it took, I know, but it doesn't work with men like we think it should) think about if he is happy with himself, then maybe try a different approach to show him you love him and he is the god that all men want to be to you. Sometimes it's just a matter of finding out what makes the other person "tick" and that can take time, even after marriage. People tend to think that when you marry, you know everything about the other person. The truth is we are always growing and changing and finding out new things about each other. The challenge is to grow together not apart, you have to communicate.

Answer 11

I can understand that. Some men and women don't want their spouses commenting on hotties on TV or anywhere else for that matter. But, I do it. Hubby knows that Jeffrey Donovan on Burn Notice is hot to me along with other hotties, but he has his fave women too. Its all for laughs too when we do it. I'm glad we can be upfront when it comes to this, b/c its better than me commenting on men behind his back, and vice versa. WE do live in a world with hot men and women.



I think if his comments bother you, then he should respect that and stop.

Answer 12

He has shown you time and time again that he does not care because he keeps doing it after you have told him that it bothers you time and time again.

You could try just not watching TV with him. When he asks why just remind of the situation and may-be he will get the hint.

It is up to him if he wants to spend time watching TV with you.

Answer 13

Well,



I think he should be sensitive to your situation, but since I am not talking to him, let me share some other advice as well.



Men are absolutely without a doubt visual creatures. We react to things that catch our eye. Women too, but not quite as much.



His reaction is just not tactful and or thoughtful of the reprecussions or how they make you feel.



Now honestly think to yourself. Have you caught yourself admiring another man. Maybe just for a moment?



Of course you don't exclaim "damn look at his 6 pack" or whatever to your husband, but you do from time to time have moments where your eyes stray a bit....am I right?



Understand that his reaction may not be the best, but you should look at the bright side also.



At least he is being honest with you.



Cheers and good luck.

Answer 14

I know this would be annoying but try not to let your husband know that it is hurting you - maybe he is doing this to get a reaction from you, do you think?



So, maybe you could say something like this,

"oh, yes, she does have a nice face or hairstyle, or whatever".

Don't let him see that it is hurting you



OR

alternatively

you could tell him in a nice way that it is hurting you.

Try to use "I' words instead of "You" words.

Say, for example,

"you know honey, I feel pretty sad or hurt when you make comments about other ladies. I know you probably feel they look good, but could you please keep your comments to yourself".



I dont believe in "getting back" but perhaps you could say

when a good looking guy is on the tv,

"Wow, he looks ok"

Just to see your husbands reaction(to prove a point).



I wish you well.

I know of guys that do this to their wives. It's annoying.

It's immature too

good luck, try not to let him get you down.

Answer 15

You need to somehow get him to understand how this makes you feel. Either start talking about the guys on TV or have a serious sit-down talk, and say "listen babe, I should be the one you are talking about, not the chicks on TV"

Answer 16

Ask him how he would feel if you commented on how hot a guy on TV is. He probably wouldn't like it if the tables were turned. Tell him that you have more respect for him than that and that you feel it is disrespectful to you that he does it. Obviously he can't help but notice a beautiful person, but tell him to keep his comments to himself.

Answer 17

This issue is YOURS, not HIS.



He feels comfortable making comments to you like this because even though other women may be attractive, he only wants YOU.



My hubby knows when I see Viggo Mortensen or George Clooney, sigh and say "He's SOOOOO handsome" it doesn't mean I want to be with them and not him. I just can appreciate a good looking person.



He knows I chose him because I love him and he is a good person. If he were insecure, like...er....others (hint, hint), he would feel threatened. Just like you do. You are insecure, so your hubby can't even admire an attractive person without you freaking out and worrying.





Perhaps some one-on-one counseling is in order? (For you, NOT him!)





Best of luck, dear.

Answer 18

well i must admit i do the same thing but not just about women on t.v its women all over and where ever we go but doesnt get out of hand, like when i see and atractive women to me ill say so and dont see anything wrong with it and neither does she , but to me if she couldnt handle me saying such i would say that she is not trusting of me as well as insecure and if we dont have that then i dont think ya have much of a relationship to begin with....

Answer 19

Your husband is a normal man. They are driven by hormones. He says things about the women on t.v. b/c he knows that there is no possibility of him ever meeting them. It's a fantasy. Now, if he starts making comments about women you see in the grocery store, then you might have a problem. If it is still bothering you, the next time you see a hot guy on the t.v. point it out to him, maybe he'll understand how you feel.

Answer 20

Wow, my husband does just the opposite -- he always has a nasty comment to make about women on tv, like how chubby they are (when they aren't really.) Just ignore him. It's not like he's going to have the opportunity to leave you for a tv actress. Unless you kick him to the curb....

Answer 21

Next time there's some "McDreamy" actor on TV, make comments about his 6-pack abs, tight buns, full head of hair, kissable lips, great arms, etc.... Go on & on like a gushing school girl. If your hubby reacts, then you've made your point!

Answer 22

So he points out the obvious and this upsets you. Sounds like he is inconsiderate and you have low self esteem. You can only work on your problem. You have no control over his.

Answer 23

1st - Mention that perhaps it does not mean anything to him but that it hurts your feelings.



2nd - Ask if there is a reason that he does this in front of you.



3rd - Choose your battles wisely. It could be so much worse.



*A friend of mine says that "...men try to keep their women thin so they can control and abuse them" I don't know how much truth there is in that but if your husband is trying to make you change the way you look, you may wanna choose a new husband!*

Answer 24

Because he's a man. Start commenting on the guys being hot. Don't just do it once - do it every time you see somebody that looks good.



Don't do it like you're joking either.. Just say it like you mean it. He'll get the hint. If he says anything about your comments you can tell him you thought it was cool for you guys to talk about how hot actors/actresses are.



My husband used to do that too. But I started beating him to it, except I'd comment on the WOMEN! "She's hot" or "great $ss"... He stopped immediately.

Answer 25

Play the game with him... You see a hot guy on the screen.

"damn aint he sexy" see how he likes it.... But seeing how he already knows that this is something that upsets you I would sugest maybe next time he does it. Throw a brick through the tv screen and see if that dont get his attention.

Answer 26

mayb e he does it to get a rise out of you, knowing it upsets you. would you rather him say things or do things? He is not right either way but what cab you do if he persists?

Answer 27

Turn the tables on him...start making comments about HOT looking guys on the tv.

Answer 28

He should be able to be honest with you about his thoughts. You know he will never fool around with a woman from the t.v., so there are no worries there... Look, there are women (other than you) who are attractive, do you want him to lie to you and say they aren't pretty? Be honest with yourself and be confident that just because he says she is pretty, that doesn't mean he wants her instead of you.

Answer 29

Some men like to keep their women on the edge, letting them know how beautiful other women are. Realize although you may love him very much that he is a jerk in this instance. If you have told him several times he obviously knows how you feel.

Answer 30

just tell him how you feel and tell him that you feel awful and if he keeps on saying does things then, when you see a good looking guy you say that he is fine to see how he feel and keep doing it to see if he gets annoying and tells you to stop.

Answer 31

I offer the immature suggestion to talk about those fine hunks of men on TV. He's just being disrespectful. He knows it hurts and he persists. That sucks.

Answer 32

Start pointing out the women before he does! I understand how you feel. Try talking to him about it.

Answer 33

It's better than him going out and cheating on you, least he's telling you what is on his mind, if he is doing this than I think he his trustworthy, if he wasn't he wounldn't be telling you like most pigs are who end up cheating on thier wives. Don't be way jeolous because that well bother him and stop him from speaking his mind. Just tell him how you really feel when he says these things again. I hope I was helpful.

Answer 34

If he won't stop then why don't you start commenting on the men on the TV and he can see how it makes him feel.

Answer 35

If you have already told him that this upsets you, then he is just being insensitive and inconsiderate of your feelings. I don't normally advocate revenge, but....start doing the same thing to him! Any time you see guys on TV, comment on how ripped their bodies are and say "I bet he has a large package". That'll get your husband to stop, trust me! =)

Answer 36

honestly try not to let it bother you, i know its hard, my boyfriend does the same thing, i let it go if he's talkin about some actress on tv, but i would let him have it if he's talkin about a girl right next to us or in the same room with us etc.(but he doesnt do that) but that is just a typical male, they dont know that things like that bother some girls, he's not doing it to make you feel bad, tell him that if he's guna think that then he needs to learn to keep his comments to himself, and not out loud. trust me, it bothers me too, but like i said i let it go because i know my boyfriend is with me, and wants to be with me, if he wanted to be with someone else, then he would of done it. same with your husband. your husband loves you but that doesnt mean he cant think another woman especially an actress ( someone who he will never meet in his entire lifetime ) is attractive. you cant tell me that you dont think other men are attractive..?? i do but that doesnt mean we are going to go run off with them. point being is just because your husband and my boyfriend happen to say those things, doesnt mean they feel any differently about you/me. you need to try and have confidence in yourself, your husband is married to YOU, is in love with YOU, if he didnt want to spend the rest of his life with you, dont you think things would be different? try not to let it bother you to much honey. best of luck

Answer 37

Start pointing out how hot the guys are and the nice bulges they have. When the shoe is on the other foot it's another story! :-)

Answer 38

Most guys don't have common sense when it comes to women...I'm sure he feels bad for making comments on other girls, but he probably can't help it. It's a guy thing...and they'll never really stop. Maybe u should try commenting on how other guys look. Then maybe he'll get the point.

Answer 39

Does he think the redhead from Peoples Court is hot?

I know I do

Answer 40

He doesn't realize how much it bothers you. He probably thinks it's funny, (guys have a sick sence of humor). I would probably fake tears until he felt so guilty he never did it again, but that's just me.

Answer 41

Guys are gonna look, thats no big deal as long as thats all they are doing. Once they go beyond that line it is a whole new story.

Answer 42

I think he is trying to indirectly say something either about you or to you. Either wasy it's insensitive and you should punish him accordingly.

Answer 43

Maybe he is just trying to make you jealous. I know it must suck though, it almost makes you feel no good enough.

Answer 44

can you talk to him about how you feel and what you are thinking?

good luck

Answer 45

It's true, he's just making comments on what he sees.

Answer 46

He's an insensitive a$$hole.

Answer 47

Men are pigs.

Answer 48

Get over it, he's a normal man. Would you rather he just talk about how beautiful they are or would you rather he do something...... sounds like you have a low self esteem, work on that and his comments won't bother you.

Answer 49

that's just how we men act

now you can't honestly say that you don't check out other men on tv?

i mean he's somewhat dumb for saying it constantly

but it actually brings more openess and honesty into the relationship

plus, they're just random women on tv



however, start worrying if he ever starts talking like that about women at work or at the gym....

Answer 50

ignore him or do the same thing with men on t.v. see how he likes it

Answer 51

do the same thing when you see a man on the screen....show him how it feels...

Answer 52

start commenting on the male actors and see what he does?

Answer 53

So what? What chance does he have of crawling into the TV to be with them?? If they even met him on the street, what chance does he have of running off with them?

Have you NEVER seen another man whom you thought was attractive?

Get some counseling for your low self-esteem and insecurities.

Answer 54

THEY ARE ALL 14 YEARS OLD, THEY NEVER SEEM GET BEYOND THIS AGE.

Answer 55

If this is your biggest problem I'd say you are being picky.



You have to look at it another way, he's secure in the relationship and has no concerns about withholding information from you.

Answer 56

he needs pills. or a schock collar.

Answer 57

aaww....dont worry..he's just a typical male..why dont u comment abt men on tv and see how he reacts...........

Answer 58

Easy question-

men are stimulated visually.

but he should keep his comments to himself.

Answer 59

he's a man, he can't help it

what? 7 thumps down? i'm trying to be honest. Would you rather have him keep it to himself?

Answer 60

They are the TV, he is never gonna have one, who cares what he says, he married you.

Answer 61

CONGRATULATIONS!



You married an insensitive azzhole!