Why are parental bonds stronger than marriage bonds?

Question

Maybe this seems like a simple to answer question, but I really would appreciate well thought-out responses. Personally, I believe that marriage bonds should be stronger. This doesn't mean that kids are last by any means. You and your spouse can both agree as a unit to put your children first. Just the cornerstone of the family should be your marriage - which it is. I believe that with a truly dedicated relationship, all the other bonds will flourish. The children will see that their parents are happy together and committed to each other and to them. The parents' respect for each other rubs off on the child and lets them know they aren't the God of the family - they must be considerate of their own and others' needs. This grounds the children’s' emotions and they revolve in harmony within the family.

I know there is nothing that compares to the experience of parenthood. But there is also nothing that compares to dedicating your life to being with someone and then extending that love into the children you have together and sharing the amazing experiences of raising them as Mom and Dad. Parenthood is a spiritual and mental experience that should be the strengthener to a lifetime bond with the one who will be there for you and with you long after your children move out and have lives of their own.

I’m trying to understand the reason why most people consider children to be in a completely separate class from their spouse.

Whew! That was long. Please respond and tell me what you think! I would love hearing any and all viewpoints on this. Thank you! =)

Answer 1

Because it is essential to our biology to be GOOD parents. You have a duty as a parent to put your children first because they NEED your help, they still have to be raised, they need the guidance and the love, etc. Your spouse also needs love too, don't get me wrong - but they are full grown adults and already their own individual. Your child is not there yet.



I agree with the notion that children should see happy parents, but I disagree that the marriage bond "should" be stronger as you say. It should be strong within its own right, but you have to work at keeping a marriage strong and loving....you shouldnt have to work at loving your children. That is there forever.

Answer 2

I agree with you completely.



However, I'm not quite sure what you meant in the next to last paragraph by saying "I'm trying to understand the reason why most people consider children to be in a completely separate class from their spouse." I believe that children should be placed in a completely different class than from the spouse. That is why we have parents who raise the children and the children who are supposed to learn from their parents. The parents are the leaders and the children the followers. Not the other way around.

Answer 3

The marriage bond should always be stronger. Is in any wonder why marriages break up? Think about it- If you put your kids first...and keep your spouse on the back burner..what kind of marriage will you have? A terrible one.

I have a fabulous marriage, I also have 2 kids. What comes 1st? Its everything to do with balance. If you know how to, then everything works out in the end. You can have the best of all worlds.

Answer 4

Parental bonds I believe are stronger. first of all you have known your parents all your life. You know what makes them happy and sad and Viceversa. Secondly, your mum brought you to earth and therefore have a biological connection at birth. Nothing on earth can top that. Thirdly, parental bonds are stronger because in times of emergency or trouble, they would always look after you no matter the deed

Answer 5

your mate is never dependent upon you like a child. You and your mate are equals the child is your responsibility.



The maternal or paternal bond with a child is what hold our society together.



Within moments of my son's birth I knew I would walk through fire for him. I have never felt that way about another adult.

Answer 6

too long, but marital bonds should be the strongest.

God says the 2 become as one.

GOOD parents give roots, then they give wings.

Answer 7

Well as one who has been divorced I can tell you. A husband can be replaced a son can not.