Question:
is my wife being immature about ending our marriage?
Timothy
2011-03-23 21:24:20 UTC
because while i was in Afghanistan last yr. and broke my promise to my wife bout not bring up our relationship issues to my parents, she says that I broke her trust. Also because I brought up divorce more than a couple of times( she counted over 10 in 8 mths., she believed that i didn't want to be married (even though I asked her if she wanted a divorce because I didn't think she was happy.) She wanted to get married, but just not on my vacation from Afghanistan. Hell, she didn't even want to start dating me until 6 mths after her divorce from her 2nd husband. But we started 1 1/2 mths after she was separated. She has since before i got home decided that since she felt she could not be herself around me and wanted to be "flirty" around other guys, that I could not handle her, that she could not be comfortable around my family, and felt no emotional attachment to me while we would sit together, that she no longer wanted to be in the marriage and decided to take her rings off in January of this yr. and let go of me emotionally. She has no desire to be around me because i stress her out, no desire to have me touch her and no desire for sex unless she needs it, which as a result I've had to emotionally disconnect myself and see her as a roommate. Just before Christmas last yr. she looked up an old boyfriend of hers from when she was 18 (she's now 33), and found him online. Over time, apparently she was also talking to her ex husband, her former employer, and this "old flame" and realized that she never should have let "things" get as far with me as they had. She admitted that her heart had belonged to this guy from the time she was 18 (because he had bought her a puppy for her birthday) and she felt that "she did love him" and wanted to make a road trip to see him and see if anything was still there or if it was just the thought of it. Mind you, she has since denied ever telling me that she was in love with me, denies ever having an emotional connection to me (it's just that we get along), and was never happy being with me because it was only supposed to have been a 1 night stand. After our 1st date, she sat down and emailed her dad and mine( they grew up as best friends) and told them that we had fallen in love and were gonna do what we could to make it work this time. She read her diary to me after we had moved in together and read where she and i had fallen in love again and she was so happy to be with me and she just wanted to get her divorce over with so that she and i could move on with our relationship.
Eight answers:
genikinz
2011-03-23 21:31:55 UTC
It's time YOU get her a puppy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mama Mia
2011-03-23 21:34:52 UTC
Sounds like a gold digger and and very immature to me. She is looking for the best deal in town and will keep moving in and out of relationships until she is too old to catch a man .That time is quickly approaching.

Note to self. A lasting relationship is built on a foundation of time spent together . Laughter tears, shared moments that build memories and just getting a firm knowledge that you have the same values and beliefs about life.That takes at least a year of being together. Those are the bricks that build a home and a marriage. Sex is just the mortar that holds those bricks together. If sex and lack of maturity are the foundation of the "house" it is alwways going to fail.
2016-12-28 17:51:57 UTC
before everything, do not let us know women a thank you to run our very own teach. We do our very own element, and we in lots of cases are quite lots smarter while it includes issues like this, so do not even pass there before everything. intercourse smart, what are YOU doing to thrill her? all I hear you saying is you like her to gown a definite way till now she even gets any, what's YOUR roll in this? I never knew a guy to understand why a woman might get upset at any think approximately my existence, I additionally never knew a guy to submit to in concepts what led to a woman to be upset. you assert she treats you like an enemy extensive form one,, what have you ever carried out to start up this style of thinking? Does she yell at you the 1st time you pass do something she asks you to do? possibly it somewhat is payback time? i'd desire to be incorrect, yet you sound thank you to annoying, and that i inform you there is not a woman in in the present day's international which will post with that. Are you a military Sargent or a husband? you won't be able to be the two. choose for marriage counselling is my opinion, shop the marriage no remember the cost, and marriage is approximately compromising, not controlling.
Big Cat on the Block
2011-03-23 23:21:51 UTC
Jake, old buddy, old pal; You have been asking different variations of this same question ever since you returned from Afghanistan. It seems you want somebody to tell you that everything is going to be okay, and that she is going to start loving you again, that you will be making love with her again, and that you two will live happily ever after. ///// It's time to walk away. It was time to walk away a long time ago. You seem to want to be some kind of self - imposed martyr in exile, thinking that if she says one kind word to you in 6 months, you still have a relationship. It's OVER !! Get over it & get on with your life. The longer you hang in there, the more you are demonstrating that you have some subconscious need to be punished.....that your perception of what constitutes "love" is warped.
?
2011-03-23 21:31:55 UTC
I think your wife just wants the benefits! Sorry. That's the first thing I think when I hear about military wives acting like that. It seems as though she wants her way with whoever she wants. I understand, when you feel so isolated from people, friends, family, you don't really have anywhere to go, or anybody to turn to. You can't talk to the single guys in your unit, because they don't quite understand, and you can;t talk to the married ones, becuase they are probably going through the same daggone thing! If your parents have been married for long enough, then it might have been best to turn to them, because they know you better than she does it seems, and especially if you have a strong bond with your parents, then it's a good thing.



Your "wife" needs to start acting like a wife. You need to sit her down and say "cut and dry, are we going to stay and work on this or are you walking out of that door?" Give her the option. It seems she is ready to leave, and besides, why stay with someone who is looking up her ex's and only saw you as a one night stand? She saw you as a ticket out of a bad spot, is what it seems to me. Sorry hun, I hope it works out best for you.
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2016-02-11 19:18:14 UTC
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2017-02-17 00:30:25 UTC
1
2011-03-24 00:26:40 UTC
you guys need a break,i mean take a long vacation and binding moments or romantic travel.





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