Haven't been sleeping well last couple of days and my wife is picking up on it and nagging me...?

Question

Last couple of nights i haven't been able to sleep well and i am not sure why but it has honestly made me irritable and distant from my wife. Been home from Iraq for about a month and a half to two months and its been rough transitioning back and my wife and i have had a few rough patches since i have been back but we worked through them and are stronger then ever. Well its 1:30am here and my wife keeps getting up and nagging me to go to bed but i am not tired in the slightest and honestly scared to sleep because when i do sleep a bunch of Nightmares and things i would rather not re-live come up and such and so its like i am avoiding sleep. I want to tell my wife whats going on but i feel like she won't understand and she wants me to take sleep aids but i am scared i will go into one of my nightmares and not be able to wake myself up out of it. Advice?

Answer 1

She will understand. Be honest with her. Tell her time in Iraq is messing with the time clock in your brain. Now it's night here but in Iraq it's like tomorrow. She'll understand.



Meantime stay up a bit, and go to bed -- let her know how about an hour I say up till I get sleepy again..is that all right with you.



We women love it when our men TALK to us. And don't ignore us. See..we think it may be SOMETHING else why you are up. We woman always think some crazy crap. So you guys have to TELL us..and then we know..and then we can go to sleep.



Easy as pie.



Glad you are home in one piece.



Thank you for all your sacrifice over there.



I'll never forget you...pleasant dreams:)

Answer 2

First off you answered your own question there: "Last couple of nights i haven't been able to sleep well and i am not sure why..." with "scared to sleep because when i do sleep a bunch of Nightmares and things i would rather not re-live come up and such and so its like i am avoiding sleep."



With you not wanting to tell your wife about these personal matters, who else can you tell? You say that your relationship is stronger than ever, well you should know the key in a good marriage is trust. Without trust, you have doubt, that eventually turns into not talking to her and maybe even seeing her in a negative way. Whether you feel you should talk to her about it or not, you made a commitment (at least I hope you did) on sticking together through the good and the bad, then acknowledge that part in doing your part in it. If she truly loves you, she will understand and if anything would want to help. Trust dude, that's what it's all about :D

Answer 3

you should talk to her, people we care about often are more understanding than we realize, true there is the occasional exception, but your wife should not be one. also, though i've never experienced war, i can understand what you must be going through, and your wife doesn't see it because you aren't communicating properly. also, everyone has nightmares no matter how horrific. what helps me, no matter how childish it seems, is to watch one of my favorite cartoons when i was a baby/very young child...it calms me down, and turning on lights helps a lot too, maybe getting some comfort food like chocolate as well....just do what calms you down and eventually, you should be able to sleep and keep the nightmares at bay for longer periods of time.... try to work it out with your wife, this seems to only have been a recent thing, there's no need to jump to the extreme over it

Answer 4

go see the doctor and ask for something to help u sleep. but if u have to gt up an go to work the next morning then tell him this. u would not want anything that would cause a hang over. sit and talk to your wife tell her how u feel and what u are thinking ask her to please try to understand where u are coming from remember she just wants u to lay beside her and hug her after all u were gone for sometime she is still lonesome the need for u to be beside her at night is power-full right now, so pet her and let her know u love her so much things will get better don;t gt mad at her ok? us women or funny people our thinking gts off track sometimes she may think u don't love her anymore i am so glad u are back home i hope its to stay and may i say thank u for what u have done for our country . ask god to help u with the night mare u are having trust in him. and he will bring u comfort i bet ya good luck

Answer 5

Does he ignore because of the fact he's busy doing some thing substantial or only because of the fact he's in front of the television? Use sticky notes, placed a million on the television reveal screen (or different glaring place) asking "have you ever taken out the trash?" or "have you ever walked the canine?" do the various projects at the same time first. locate the episode of Oprah (or develop into it Dr Phil) that covers how the guy doing abode chores is a sort of foreplay for his woman. additionally use constructive re-enforcement...while he does a chore reward him for it...placed on some thing extra desirable-sexy for him, make him some thing he loves..something to teach him you have observed he did it. My husband now comes abode from paintings takes the youngsters from me gets the older one to help him %. each and all the toys away and vacuum. There are days while he even cleans up the kitchen for me and that's no longer all - we are additionally having the main surprising intercourse we've had in months and fairly often too :) Oh yeah, only examine Susan's placed up and remembered some thing I examine the place a learn develop into dome on couples who have been married for an somewhat long term and the main necessary element is being well mannered and respectful to a minimum of one yet another....with very virtually all couples an substantial section develop into asserting please and thank you.

Answer 6

Well I would first ask yourself why it is you can tell complete strangers on Yahoo Answers all of this but you can't tell your own wife. I mean that seriously, not sarcastically. From the sound of things, what you're going through is completely understandable and unless you're married to a heartless beast, I don't see her being anything but loving and understanding about it all.



You've been back from Iraq for less than two months. You're growing distant from her and irritable with her, and you're up at 1:30am on the Internet. Typically that would scream affair or at least set major doubts in a spouses mind. Perhaps that is why she comes across as so irritated about this. So rather than allow her mind to wander to incorrect assumptions, talk to her. Your vows included, "In sickness and in health" so if you're having physical, emotional, or mental issues affecting you, she's the one you should be turning to for help to get through it.



Good luck to you, and I truly thank you for your service to our country!

Answer 7

Honestly, go talk to a doctor. Lack of sleep can cause some serious problems health wise and with your wife.

Answer 8

valerian capsules or tea may help you sleep, and be sleepy.

I Believe Bigello Sleepy time tea contains it.



http://www.anxiety-and-depression-solutions.com/articles/complementary_alternative_medicine/herbs_supplements/valerian.php





You can buy it OTC at walmart or anywhere.

I like the tea before bed.

Maybe a chamomille-valerian tea if you can find it, give it a try, its just a cup of tea, and may help.



I just suggest this as a way to sleep better, Your other issues aside.

Without good sleep, your other daily events will be worse.

Answer 9

do you have sleep apnea i did and would have wild steven king like dreams to the point that my heart would go out of rhythm they were vary vivid and powerful seen a doc and got a cpap machine now i sleep good.

Answer 10

She isn't very understanding is she?

Advice? See a doctor and a therapist so you can talk about all of this. Nightmares can dissipate when we pick them apart and talk about them.