Would cheating be justified here?

Question

Okay, so I want my husband to please me and he just won't. He never let's me get an orgasm, the sex is quick and boring, he won't go down on me, etc etc etc. We've been married for one year. Now, he rarely wants to have sex, like once a month. I'm having strong urges where I've started pleasing myself but it's getting boring too now. I've tried talking to him about it, and I do love him and want to be with him but he won't and/or can't please me sexually. So should I just find another partner for sex, I know one guy(the best I've ever had) and I'm considering calling him soon. Is this justified, since I've tried talking to him and pleasing myself? I've tried everything, I don't want to seem selfish but it's been a year, when is enough enough?

Answer 1

Cheating Justified

Answer 2

Cheating is never justified. We get it, you are frustrated because your husband doesn't give you what you want and it's totally fine for you to be upset, but cheating over this is totally stupid ( cheating in general is stupid, no matter the reason). My advice would be to talk to your husband and seek help from a relationship counselor. Just remember that as a couple, you have to make sacrifices for each other. If you are still not happy then you can divorce your husband if you want but you have to really think about it if that really is something that you want. Cheating only makes you the weaker person, no matter how much you try and justify it

Answer 3

Guess what.



When you marry someone you will have to deal with all kinds of tough problems together. You will have to face up to them as a team. And the sexual one: "this person doesn't have enough sex or doesn't have sex with me ever, and I am horny af" is one of the most common ones. It's like the cream of the crop, without the cream, of marriage problems. ..xD



TELL HIM. Work on it! If you are ready to cheat already, after you've "tried everything", then I don't think you two should have got married (yet). Yes I sound like a douche, but I am being real here. No, it's not your fault right now that he's not being good in bed. That's HIS fault and it sucks. It is the worse and causes depression and resentment and all kinds of things. That's not your fault, you are innocent. However...



It will be your fault though if you decide to cheat on him. It's your job, to go talk with him, as many times as it takes until he realizes this problem and you tell him, that you will leave if it continues. If something is bothering you, you go tell him and work on it. You tell him how much it sucks and you also ask him if there is anything wrong (maybe he's scared and doesn't know what to do). You show him how easy it can be, and how fun it can be for him, hearing you get off (erhem yep) it will be like the awakening of his soul, trust me. Communicate! Show him that. If he gets off that fast I have a feeling he hasn't had much experience, so you might want to give him some courage. If he's scared which I am 98% certain he is, and will think up excuses saying he's too tired or what not. Tell him to cut it out and brave up. Also, tell him it's okay to be nervous, work on it. He's got to try though.



That way he has a chance. You don't cheat. That is lying to him and basically betraying him in one of the worse ways a human can betray another person that she "loves".



Marriage is a lot of work. Get working. Don't jump ship the moment the waters get rough. Try to navigate the storm and fix it. Otherwise you will sink a lot of ships.

Answer 4

Cheating

Answer 5

Cheating is never justified it seems you married someone who is rather selfish and also has a low sex drive or interest in sex. With you being married such a short time maybe this is not the man for you consider a divorce and move on with your life. The reality is that marriage is not simply all about a sexual partner more so a companion now you can feel like 90% of the married men men who have to deal with this from their wives and being in a sexless marriage. You could always bridge the counseling topic with him but in reality even counseling is not going to change a way a man is sexually with a woman some men are just lazy and selfish when it comes to sex. No counselor is going to be able to say to a man you need to go down on your wife from time to time and he is going to be like okay. Seems like these are things you should have known about your husband before marriage unless you waited until you got married to have sex the reality is your husband could just be shy and uneducated to how to pleasure a woman in that way and he is worried about not satisfying you tell him you can show him the ropes and what he should do. Tell him it is not right to not satisfy your wife and that stopping once he gets off is just wrong and selfish even if he has lost his erection he must try other things to help you arrive to the same point of pleasure he has.

Answer 6

Cheating is never justified. It is still a betrayal in the sense that you are sneaking around behind your husband's back, he is not aware at all of what is going on. A marriage should always be honest and trustworthy. Once dishonesty and untrustworthiness are introduced, it leads to a whole host of problems (which you will have to deal with along with the current problem you are facing, which is dissatisfaction with your sex life)



When you have discussed the topic with your husband, have you stressed the fact that you are unhappy? If you have, and if your husband seems not to care, then that is a problem. Spouses should always be concerned when their partner is unhappy in the marriage. Have you tried marriage counseling?



If you have exhausted every possible avenue as far as improving your sex life and nothing has changed, you will have to be honest with your husband regarding your sexual needs. Tell him, honestly, that you cannot live like this, and if he cannot fulfill your sexual needs then you will need to find someone who will. Your husband can decide to work on himself and do what he can to fill that role, he can agree to an open marriage and allow someone else to fill it, or he can leave the marriage if he is opposed to either of the first two options.



If divorce is something you simply do not wish to go through, you will need to decide which is more important: keeping your marriage or a satisfying sex life. If your husband refuses to work on himself and if he will not agree to an open marriage, then you can only have one or the other, you cannot have both. So choose the one that is more important to you, then either stay married or get a divorce depending on your choice.

Answer 7

If you have to ask, the answer is no. I don't know why you even bothered to post this. You're already cheating. You're lusting after another man and considering phone phucking him behind your husband's back. You're looking for someone to encourage you; so here you go. Let's say you do cheat on your husband, It won't be your fault because HE was the one who failed you, you get to have your orgasmic guilt-free sex, and then when the poor chump finds out he's been cucked you can just file for a "no fault" divorce, take him for a ride through the divorce grinder, be rewarded fabulous cash and prizes(house, cars, retirement, alimony, etc.) reclaim your freedom, and the best part is that your new lifestyle of being pumped and dumped on the regular by loads of strange men will be mostly financed by your ex! not to mention all the positive attention you'll be getting from all your envious girlfriends, and society at large!

Answer 8

Former player...



My girlfriend doesn't really always want sex, I do a lot... But do I cheat? Hell no, why? Because I love my girl and I am very happy with her...



But in your situation, that's your HUSBAND, you are the one who said "Yes" when he proposed (I am assuming he proposed) You are the one who signed the contract that you will be loving him for eternity (I know about divorce, its just the pastor saying his sh!t)



Cheating is never justified, I cheated before, but that's because I was a retarded 16 year old... Now that Im 17, I may have gained a little more maturity. The maturity YOU as an adult should have.

Answer 9

Definitely not justified. I don't think you're stressing exactly how bad the situation is to your husband. Tell him the truth in that you're actually considering cheating on him. Sure an argument might ensue, but at least you'll get your point across. That should grab his attention, and if it doesn't then it's probably about time for you two to part ways.

Answer 10

Lets go beyond i mean suppose you have cheated him , now you have sex with your friend for more than a month , what you think on sex part you are happy but some or another day your husband will come to know , life will be more mess and disturbance will start .



After cheating your husband if you get caught it will happen one day sooner or later you will be caught than how the things will be prepare ,today you are disturb tomorrow you will be disturb more .



Today one problem you have tomorrow it will more just imagine and go ahead .

One ore suggestion ,i am giving you wrong advice but if you want then , you can make be with your mind but once in a blue moon ,actually what happence practical if a person have a extra marital affair they take it so high that one day they get caught and things are over in a bad way , so you can be smart and handle this issue ,enjoy some day and make your urge satisfy .



One things also happens guys to whom we be with force on us then we become helpless ,you should have full confidence in your friend b coz boys have a habit to take benefit out of it ,any more advice you want than mail me at [e-mail]

Answer 11

And this is a surprise to you? You must have know how your boyfriend was before you married him, right? But you married him anyway because you "loved him". Did you think that things were magically going to be different? If you feel like cheating then you should feel like filing papers for a divorce. I can't even wrap my head around the fact that you're trying to find someone who will justify "cheating". Beware if someone replies with a "yes". Not healthy.

Answer 12

It’s not justified here, unless you have tried every option and you’re at the (separation stage).

Clearly, communication has not worked. But it could be a deeper rooted issue- perhaps he’s going through something (which is effective is ability).



Have a more, in depth conversation. You might actually be surprised.



This other guy, that you’re considering….out of interest- how would you feel if your husband had a female on standby? For similar reasons. I don’t think you’d be too pleased.

Answer 13

No, nothing justifies cheating, you need a divorce. You can ask him to allow you a lover, but he gets to have one too. It's not the act of shagging someone that's the worst thing about cheating, the lying, the sneaking around is the worst.



Your marriage does not sound worth saving and how can you love a man who never gave you an orgasam is beyond me.

Answer 14

Cheating is NEVER justifiable .. EVER. My husband started cheating on me 5 years after we were married and I was lied to for 7 years before he mentioned that it was with my sister-in-law (at the time). I was so hurt and felt like he just drop kicked my soul straight out my body, my heart felt as if pieces that it got broken into would never heal completely... I started to think that maybe I was just too fat for him, just not enough for him, that because he always wants oral and I just don't do that.. so it was all my fault.. thing is, it is his own fault, his own doing, what he couldn't find at home he found else where & destroyed what could have been a wonderful marriage for us. I can't say that I hate him but I can say I do not love him as I once have, I will never trust him again nor believe anything he says. I thought about that goose and gander thing, you know, one good turn deserves another but than I'd be no different than he. Cheating will destroy a marriage no matter the reasoning behind it, if it don't end up in a divorce then there is mistrust and suspicion as long as you are together. If you love him enough then continue to try and talk to him, please yourself.. AND, to be a bit of a teacher, do stuff short, quick & "unpleasing" to him.. when he starts to question that then that is the time to make him understand how it feels for you.

Answer 15

Well ,it looks that your husban has other mistress..or you have an intelectual scientific misogin husband..does he study all the time or has a career in a very hard field of work?



Now the problem is that this doesn t matter..



He does not love you i don t know why he married you ...if you have a superior financial condition that could be why...like a gigolo.tgis is from devil s servants are very difficylt to be caught..you must divorce and assert you do not believe in his love or if he insists that you are not fond of this type of man resulring inside since you are married..



The two who marru acvording to bible is anounced they will have sex except when they have fast for saints..this implies that being relaxed a man is normal to sleep once a week if he works 5 days..and he hasn t an exhausting job..if he has a hard job ...and is not the type..he cannot handle..so it results a man must have our bussiness or land ..in order to be free fir sex..and have a relationship .with wife

Answer 16

That's cheating

Answer 17

Cheating is never justified. You're physical needs aren't being met, and you want a "valid" excuse to seek companionship else where. If you're not happy with what you have at home, then talk to your husband about how you feel. He may or may not listen. But don't cheat simply because you think that it's what you need.

Answer 18

Cheating isn't justified, or it wouldn't be cheating. Leave the man and divorce him. You don't love him. If you did, you wouldn't be posting this on yahoo answers asking for support to go behind his back for the best sex of your life. I repeat: you don't love him. You had the thought, then thought better of it and now your selfishness has proven you don't really care about your husband. You're just seeing how bad the damage control will be if it gets out and goes south. How relatable is your dilemma if you can't stop yourself? That's why you posted on here. Just come clean to yourself and your husband and limit the damage.

Answer 19

I'm going to be blunt. You need to take charge, gently. Being the recipient of 'quick & boring' sex is not satisfying. So, don't have intercourse until he has got you so worked up you're about to blow. If he won't go down on you, you should ask him WHY, in a non-demanding or confrontational way, outside of bedroom. Maybe he just isn't into that, like some gals don't like giving bj's. Maybe you're being aggressive, confrontational, or he's feeling inadequate bc of your reaction or approach to this issue already. Is he healthy emotionally, mentally & physically? Has he been checked by a physician? If he finishes too quickly, then he's got the urge, and 'it works'. But needs to learn discipline (to hold off) and do what pleases you too. That HAS to be a 2-way street. Guide him, teach him, slow him down.. be sweet, sexy & gentle. Baby steps. Tell him what excites you as he does it. Make him feel confident. Lure him in, not badger or demand, or allow him to jump in too quick. Take charge.

Answer 20

Cheating is never justified. Have some class and leave first.

Answer 21

No cheating is justified. Ever.

If it's something that's THAT

important to you, then you

simply need to end the

marriage. Alternatively,

you could try to change

the constraints of marriage,

i.e. discuss what you are so

desperately wanting to do,

honestly and openly, giving

HIM the option of staying in

the marriage or not.

Answer 22

Cheating is never justified, if you are willing to cheat just because you want more sex then you dont really love and respect him and are better of divorcing.

Answer 23

Cheating is never justified, I say try new things. Buy lingerie get handcuffs and have a ball, over all though sex is about the giveing and reciveing of pleasure. If he's being lazy you need to tell him straight up your needs matter to and tell him how you feel. Or starve him for a bit, don't have quick boring sex or any for that matter and see what happens and when he Finnaly gets super horny tell him he doesn't get what he needs till you get what you need.

Answer 24

Cheating is never justified, besides when you cheat, you are really cheating your own integrity. For the rest of your life you will have to live with the fact that you are a scoundrel and cannot be trusted..

Answer 25

Cheating is never justified

Answer 26

No, cheating is never justified. You and your husband need to see a marriage counsellor or sex therapist to find out why he doesn't really want sex. If that doesn't work, get a divorce and then you can hook up with the other guy for sex.

Answer 27

You don't need to cheat on your husband for any reason. Your husband's problem is serious. Suggest you try and talk with him. Ask him if he wants to work toward healing the marriage with you. If that doesn't work, suggest he go to a doctor that specializes in his issue. Cheating is usually a selfish way of solving things.

Answer 28

In my book, it wouldn't be cheating at all. If a spouse doesn't even attempt to satisfy their mate, there's no reason for them to complain. You might as well get the guy who can ring your bell, you might live with your husband for a few years but you will get divorced from him unless he lets you have a lover to take his place. Why don't you tell him you need a lot more sex, like 5 or 6 times a week, either you take care of me now or I will get a a guy who will or we can get a divorce now, WHAT'S YOUR CHOICE?

Answer 29

It's never justified to cheat. You need to file for divorce if you think so little of your husband.

Answer 30

Cheating is NEVER NEVER justified. You just want to have sex with another and don't care about your marriage vows. If its that bad, then divorce your husband and go sleep with who you want. Sad that both of you really are not trying that hard but making more excuses.

Answer 31

Not until you have tried everything which includes couples counseling. Better still would be a sex therapist, and yes, they definitely exist and are licensed. There is at least one underlying problem and that needs to be discovered. Why does he have desire discrepancy? A normal healthy man should want sex more than once a month. It could even be medical, but you both must sort it out together. He promised you a lifetime of monogamous sexual intimacy and he owes you that. Get to the bottom of why before you outsource your love making. He needs to know that many women do not reach climax by penetration alone, and it is his responsibility to stimulate you before or during penetration. I have a feeling you would reward him richly.

Answer 32

Your so called husband is not fit to be a husband because he is unable to understand his wife's physical needs in terms of sex .First thing he should not have got married .Cheating is not the solution to your problem .Best thing is to discuss the matter with your husband and if his response is not satisfactory tell him you have no alternative other than filing action for a divorce . This is more honourable than cheating .

Answer 33

Cheating is NEVER justified.



Talk to him again. If necessary, find marriage counselling. But if you are going to F*** someone else, just get a divorce.

Answer 34

Simplest way I see to work this problem out is to tell your husband straight up that if he isn't interested in satisfying you in the bedroom, then you are happy to call up another dude who will. He will either give you permission to do so, or he will up his sex game. You say you have tried talking to him, but I doubt you've gone as far as to tell him you already have a replacement lover lined up. Until you tell him that, I don't think you can say you've talked enough. Also, there's a good chance he is already cheating on you... Just saying.

Answer 35

Nothing is an excuse for cheating. What kind of idiot are you to marry someone you are not sexually compatible with? That is all YOUR FAULT. If you are unhappy get a divorce you cheap $lut and sleep around all you want. Don't pretend to be a dutiful wife and sleep around. Why are you even married? You don't love your husband. You don't respect him. You don't want to develop communication skills to show him what you want and like. You just want to cheap and pretend to be married to get benefits out of it like the cheap whore that you are. You are pathetic. I hope that you get caught not only by him but your entire family, friends and social circle, neighborhood, people at work that you never live the humiliation down.

Answer 36

Cheating is never justified, ever. Go do your homework hun, you sound like you're not much older than 14. You aren't mature enough to be married.

Answer 37

This is marriage, darling. Nobody said that it would be happily ever after. This, of course, is not to imply unhappiness within your union. However, there will be kinks and these are there for the both of you to learn how to compromise.



Perhaps, you expect him to f*uck you all the time that his penis is now numb from all of the work that he has had to put in. A guy can only last for so long, while women...So, you must understand this before you decide to take the easy way out and possibly ruin your marriage over lust. This is why lust is one of the seven deadly sins.

Answer 38

Either fix your marriage or end it. The only way you should take a lover, is with your spouse's consent (which I doubt you'll get). Screwing around will just leave you divorced anyway, but if you initiate divorce without cheating then you're just a divorced woman...versus a divorced cheater (with all the karma that comes along with that behavior).

Answer 39

Be up front with him, sex is one thing in marriage that brings a man and woman close, and keep them close through the marriage. If you don't have this closness, sooner or later if you do love him it will change and you will lose your love and respect for him. Talk to someone, before you do something you will regret. If things don't change, then, I think divorce is the only option. I couldn't live that way either. Good Luck.

Answer 40

Cheating is never justified. And sounds like if u did take a lover, youd soon be bored

Answer 41

Cheat

Answer 42

No. Cheating is never justified. If you are not happy with your husband, within your marriage, then leave and don't look back. Cheaters have no integrity. Don't be one.

Answer 43

Cheating is never okay. Try talking to your husband about this situation instead of coming on here and asking people if cheating is okay just because you don't get pleasure. it's not and it makes you look petty. sorry but it's the truth.

Answer 44

Cheating is never okay. Think about how you would feel if he did that to you. Do you love your husband? Do you want to make it work with him? Find out what is going on with him. Tell him exactly how you feel. Get professional help. If there is nothing that you can do, and he is not willing to work on the problem, you should leave. Cheating on him is not going to solve your problems.

Answer 45

Is that not Adultery? A Criminal Offense? It is a misdemeanour and a sufficient grounds for bringing a divorce enactment. Don't cheat. Talk it out.

Answer 46

No I think you should keep trying with him,seek help,etc exhaust all

Avenues before doing anything and by anything I don't mean cheat,that will make things worse,unless in talking to him that is agreed on

He might be ok with an open marriage or some other adult thing

Answer 47

There is never a reason (excuse) for cheating. You might explain to him how you are going to seek satisfaction for your needs elsewhere and get his reaction. If you do that, at least you will be honest with him and, that alone, would take the sting out of cheating.

Answer 48

I waited 20 years before I cheated. When she stopped having her periods she wouldn't sleep with me anymore. So one day I just weaken and had an encounter with an escort. I ain't saying I am proud of what I done, but I just wanted to have sex again.

Answer 49

Its never really justified if one of the partners feels it would be breaking your commitment. it's a tough spot to be in.. which will call for an uncomfortable chat about how to get your needs met

Answer 50

Cheating is really never justified.

Answer 51

Cheating is NEVER justified. There are always other options.

Answer 52

In my opinion cheating in any circumstance isn't okay, however my advice would be to think logically about whether your sexual pleasures are worth ruining your relationship. If your husband decides in a few months hes ready to have sex properly and meet your sexual needs... you'd be devastated that you cheated, and if he found out he would also be devastated.

Answer 53

If it was ever justified, it wouldn't be called CHEATING.



Tell your husband flat out that if something doesn't change, the marriage will end.

Answer 54

You're going to do it anyway, why ask us to reinforce your decision? It's not an acceptable thing to do, but it's probably better than your alternatives. Good luck, you're going to need it.



Ignore all the flaming idiots that criticize you!! They've never been in this situation, and have no right to comment or judge you!!! They are totally not qualified!!

Answer 55

As you love him make him aware of your dissatisfaction with his attitude and performance as kindly as possible and suggest that in order to stay married you want him to come with you to Marriage Guidance Counselling or perhaps Psycho sexual therapy. Until you are certain that there is no solution to these problems them separate and file for divorce. Do not look outside of your marriage until it is over, cheating is never right.

Answer 56

no this is not enough to justify you cheating. did you have sex before you got married? if so how often and did he satisfy you? if not you should have discussed it then. the only thing is that you are in a incompatiable marriage and you need to consider getting counseling to see what his problem is.

Answer 57

CHEATING is NEVER justified. Get some counseling.

Answer 58

You don't want to be selfish?

All your words are leading in this direction.

If you really, but really love him, then sex is a natural consequence of a relationship.

Sex can not be the foundation of a relationship. Perhaps because you're valuing sex so much, he doesn't want it till you show a soul connection.

Answer 59

Cheating is NEVER justified. If you are not happy with him, then get a divorce. Maybe he is secretly gay, who knows? Most guys want sex as much they can get it from their wife. It is unusual a for man not wanting to have sex with his wife, considering you two have only been married for a year! Most guys are very horny for the first year or two , when they get married! Their wives are fed up with their demand of sex, all the time.

Answer 60

well ,it looks that your husban has other mistress......or you have an intelectual scientific misogin husband......does he study all the time or has a career in a very hard field of work?



now the problem is that this doesn t matter......



he does not love you i don t know why he married you .........if you have a superior financial condition that could be why.........like a gigolo...tgis is from devil s servants are very difficylt to be caught......you must divorce and assert you do not believe in his love or if he insists that you are not fond of this type of man resulring inside since you are married......



the two who marru acvording to bible is anounced they shall have sugar except when they have fast for saints......this implies that being relaxed a man is normal to sleep once a week if he works 5 days......and he hasn t an exhausting job......if he has a hard job .........and is not the type......he cannot handle......so it results a man must have our bussiness or land ......in order to be free fir sugar......and have a relationship ...with wife

Answer 61

No, either get him straightened out or divorce him. You deserve sex but so does he. How about some type of counseling? Have your tried other things to get him going? And you need to talk about it. If he is done and your aren't, he has got to realize that doesn't work. What is his solution to the problem.

Answer 62

Cheating is never justified. Leave him he doesn't deserve you.

Answer 63

Tell him you need to talk and explain how you feel. Make a schedule of intimacy and tell him all you need. If he doesn't change than tell him you can't continue with him and you need to separate from him. It's better than the other plan as you're being honest and upfront with him. Good luck.

Answer 64

Nope, cheating is NEVER justified.

Answer 65

I had sex before marriage. This might have been wrong or selfish but I think we should try before we buy.

Some men leave women because they are untidy in the home or refuse to be a good home maker, refuse to have children or refuse to work.

Before I married my husband k knew he was everything I wanted, that's including sexually.

Answer 66

Cheating is not a solution. You have grounds to divorce him, and in your future relationships, make sex a priority, once you find a man with mutual compatibility. If he is not into sexual appreciation, move on, simple as that.

Answer 67

NO.



It never is. If there's a problem you can't or shouldn't deal with, leave. Was there some part of the marriage vows about being faithful that was unclear?

Answer 68

Don't do it, this will be the worst mistake you ever make. How would you feel if you caught him cheating with another woman. Think about it

Answer 69

No but leaving a man who is a very ignorant and selfish lover would be. If you can't talk him around and he won't do counselling then you have every right to get rid of him.

Answer 70

Lady, I would really have a lot of sympathy for you, but as you are female I find it difficult to do so. Why? Because you females have no problems or issues with married women who tell their husband no all the time or who are about as appealing and pleasing to him as a rock. In fact, a lot of you women love to joke and laugh about how you do men. Has it ever dawned upon you that a lot of men and nature itself is now getting even with women for how they have acted?

Answer 71

Seek counseling for both of you. He may be gay or have gay leanings. You need to get a divorce or annulment, if the problem cannot be solved, and move on. No cheating required.

Answer 72

Divorce him, if you can't deal with it. Cheating is betrayal. If anything, tell him about it and maybe you could have a polyamorous relationship or something.

Answer 73

Whenever someone uses the word justified, they already feel guilty. Tell him how you feel, ask permission to see other people, buy a vibrator and learn to please yourself, couples counselling, divorce, if you can describe your actions using the words cheating, you will probably regret it later

Answer 74

u have every right to call me and well u know. I am kidding leave don't cheat if u cheat u are lowering yourself to a bad level and u will always have a quilt feeling no matter what you think its not good.

Answer 75

HELL NO!! The fact that you're even thinking about it makes it seem like you're only in your marriage for the sex and if he can't please you, find another guy who will?! You're not in high school, you're married! Take it seriously! Have a serious talk with him about how you feel and try to find a solution.

Answer 76

Tell him it is important to you that the sex be better. Try to explain what you mean by it being better.



There are also other things you could do to satisfy him (doesn't have to be sexual): offer to do those things as a trade off.

Answer 77

I don't know why these sort of dilemma's are not sorted out long before people get married and end up posting such ridiculous questions such as this. Sex is a very big part of any relationship and many happily go along with a wham-bam-thank-you-mam post their wedding, and once married a certain period of time start complaining how crap the sex is. Firstly, anyone can have sex, but sadly many are unable to fully satisfy their partner during love making because of extremely poor communication. It goes both ways, although sadly, women appear to suffer more greatly than men tend to do historically. I know that in your case you have tried to communicate with him to no avail, and possibly also tried before getting married, so why did you marry him in the first place if the sex was crap then. Historically you should have know that women have had to endure such hardship in the bedroom through conversations with your girlfriends since puberty, yet you still allow yourself to settle for too many wham-bam-thank-you-mam's. He on the other-hand because of your action believes he's Gods gift to women, and Casanova all rolled into one,. because no one has told him different. How long are women going to continue to massage the male ego, and accept crap sex during courtship before marriage before speaking up? If you went shopping and was short changed you would speak up, whether it be a male or female cashier right? So, what's the difference as far as sex is concerned because you've put in the maximum amount of effort to ensure he as a good time during sex, yet he short changes you and you don't say a thing? Despite what I've said, you know your relationship far better than I do, so ask yourself? Have I allowed myself to be short changed for too long and contributed to the crap sex life I'm now saddled with? Is opting to just have sex with a male friend the answer to your current dilemma? Wouldn't it just be easier to just walk away from having to accept crap sex once a month? Do you love him enough to emotionally cripple him once he finds out about your FWB, because that what it'll do to him once he finds out? I hardly think that you're pensionable age and should be considering the FWB action based on sticking with your husband because it's the right thing to do. The right thing for many women to have done long ago was to not listen to clichés offered up by whomever to justify a certain scenario or way of life. If relationships were solely about companionship and sharing a wealth of art and literature having FWB would certainly work for everyone. However whether, promotionally or historically marriage is suppose to be a package "a whole package" of many things we are prepared to offer to the one person we deem our Kindred Spirit. Somewhere throughout the course of history it's gotten screwed up and we started to all become more and more selfish "especially men", and so we're all saddled with a bunch of bad clichés and feds of how to survive relationships, breakups, being single, marriage, divorce, and many more that I cannot be bothered to mention. So, whatever any of us may suggest isn't going to immediately sort out your dilemma, but also is having FWB? I really do wish you the very best whatever your decision is.

Answer 78

that's cheating

Answer 79

Cheating is only saying I hate what you did but I still want you.....leave and make it known that you deserve better

Answer 80

Yes. Cheating is appropriate in your situation. I suggest you get registered at a dating site for married people. And find a man that is into cunnilingus.

Answer 81

Divorce would be justified.

Answer 82

If both of you are not willing to find a compromise, then end it before you have any kids. Perhaps you need to learn the difference between love and lust.

Answer 83

No, cheating should NEVER be okay. Talk to him about it, and in the mean time just buy a vibrator.

Answer 84

Its perfectly justified. You need to find pleasure for yourself. If he cant do it, get it where you can. You will both be happier for it.

Answer 85

Maybe this has been said already, but if you want to remain married to him and sex is your only issue, ask his permission to engage in extramarital sex.



Come back with his answer. We can discuss further then.

Answer 86

Seek a male sex expert For him rather than looking someone to have sex with -_- which kind of people are living in this world....

Answer 87

Tell him what you want. Tell him that you need more. Tell him it's very important to you and it's a deal breaker and that you can't see your life with unfulfilling sex and that you are willing to go to a sex therapist if needed.

Answer 88

no matter what cheating can't be justified. period

Answer 89

No, you know it's wrong. Get a divorce

Answer 90

No. Try to work it out give him a year. If nothing changes move on.

Answer 91

He may have ED or depression. Try asking him to see a doctor.

Answer 92

Id say,Try,.a Little thing Called,(Cuckolding)it would Help You at least.

Answer 93

No, you should divorce him if your thinking about other guys. I don't want to be married to a girl who thinks about other guys, I want to be married to a girl who gives me her all and I give her my all.

Answer 94

Get a divorce. Now. Reason is You'll forever resent him because he is not a fair lover in certain ways. Please listen to me.

Answer 95

No. Marriage is a bond, for if you go have sex with another person, then you are no better than a whore. Talk to him. Again. And seduce him and make him want to please you!

Answer 96

He sounds like my ideal guy, a bloke who doesnt want sex... maybe you should find someone else who is more suited to your needs!

Answer 97

Cheating is fine.......if you want to destroy your marriage.

Try marriage guidance together. Talk, talk and talk.

Answer 98

It's called marriage - sex sucks

Answer 99

Its cheating. Period.

Answer 100

It's only justifed if he's OK with it. Otherwise get a divorce and find someone else that can please you mentally AND sexually.

Answer 101

Get yourself some Dominatrix Lingerie and tell him to get his azz up to the bedroom. Crack the whip, and make him surrender.

Answer 102

Damn. I wish I was your lover. I love c*mming inside married women. ;)

Answer 103

No. How would you like it if the tables were turned. Do unto others.

Answer 104

Just want pts

Answer 105

Work out your marriage or end it.

Answer 106

Find a man who can change your oil properly...its ur life...

Answer 107

He needs viagra. Ask him to see his doctor.

Answer 108

yes

Answer 109

well let me say this when ur partner doesnt want to have sex with you anymore,that means that there seeing someone else most of the time and dont wanna tell u.

Answer 110

Get a divorce if its so damn bad

Answer 111

Why not my whole street swings

Answer 112

divorce. you don't seem happy. one life! peace!

Answer 113

why is he checked out? maybe your ******** stinks like a skunk...

Answer 114

No

Would u like if he does it with someone else

Answer 115

Yes go get laid .. its ok he is a jerk I will bang u anytime

Answer 116

Why would you marry someone just for sex?

Answer 117

Have you tried praying?

Answer 118

Do it

Answer 119

no, same answer if the roles were reversed

Answer 120

you are selfish. Period.

Answer 121

no

Answer 122

no

Answer 123

No, it is not.

Answer 124

lol

Answer 125

No.

Answer 126

OKAY