l don't know lf l stlll love my husband?

Question

15 yrs. together so many mlxed feellngs! We've had some very rough tlmes, and l've been physlcally and emotlonally abused before ln the past. ln the last 2 years lts been better but l just don't know lf l love hlm anymore. He drlnks 24/7 but he's not a nasty drunk, anymore. But some of the stuff he's sald to me ln the past and done to me l just don't have that romantlc place wlth hlm anymore. lord knows l've trled and trled to get that romance back but nothlng! We've seperated once and l had met someone and we were pretty serlous but my husband threatened sulclde and l came back to hlm. l'm just so confused anymore. l know know he ls ln a better frame of mlnd that lf l choose to leave hlm he would be ok, but l don't know lf thats the answer! lf thats what l want to do. Because l left hlm before and he knew about the other guy he's so much always on my back tryln to see everythlng l'm doln. Wlch l have not glven hlm any reason at all ln the last 2 years to be that way. l can't even just have a glrlfrlend to hangout wlth nlght or day. l just don't thlnk thls ls healthy and l don't know what to do. So how do you know lf you really love your husband anymore. Even lf l ask myself slmple questlons about us l can't answer them. Help, l need some good advlce!

Answer 1

I don't want to compare my past situation but I think I understand. I was once in love with this guy and when things went wrong, he threatened to hurt himself so I stayed. You will probably always ask him, but ask yourself this. Do you think you feel more sorry for him right now than love him? I know I did. I think that you should seek counseling and if he doesn't want to go, go on your own. It is not healthy not to have any outside friends. You shouldn't feel this way and he is playing on your emotions. Seek professional help. I hope everything works out.

Answer 2

Are you feeling like the stuff that hes done to you in the past is causing you to neglect your feelings for him? Have you moved on from the physical and emotional abuse? if not...this is the first step you need to take to try to do in order for a healthy successful relationship. Counseling could help you out with this. What kind of things are you doing to try to get that romance back ? Probably one of the first steps to rekindle that romance is to take a short break from eachother and give eachother a chance to miss one another and just relax and let your feelings go and have a good time. I would take a 1-2 week break if you are able to take a trip somewhere. While you're doing that, I would change something about yourself. Get a makeover,a hair cut,a new wardrobe,learn a new talent or skill like how to dance or something. Keep changing...the same old stuff in a relationship gets boring after awhile. But if this is not the answer you are looking for and is not helping and you still want to figure out weather you are still in love with your husband or not....well think about some of these things? Do you guys still have great communication? is there a still a great conncetion there or do you often feel distant connection from eachother? Do you think you could be confusing that you don't love him because you've had negative experiences in your relationship and you just dont know how to fix it even though you really want to?

Answer 3

Dear I am in the exact same situation. I started looking into psychology for myself, but then everything I was reading made me think, and it kind of woke me up to alot of things. Look up sociopath and psychopath. Then you have to ask yourself does this describe him, and if you feel that your love could have been real or manipulation? If you still can't decide a counselor told me to write down what I love about my husband and when it came down to it the list is still blank after a week of thinking. My husband matched 18 of 20 characteristics of a psychopath, so now i'm thinkin I was brainwashed for too long. He also tells me if I leave he will commit suicide or hunt me down like an animal. In the end you have to just separate yourself and hope that he doesn't commit suicide, but know that if he does it really is NOT your fault no matter what he says. I wish you the best of luck

Answer 4

Look some one needs to have the back bone in this family. That person will be you. So your husband is going threw depression and the only is to drink and forget or what ever. Now, it's up to you to set the tone, because your going to be the mother figure and your not going to stand for it. Now, you need to find some thing for him to do. Set a routine, Sunday go to church, Wednesday. go to the park (fishing, walking) Fridays visit family (cemetery, alive or dead) the thing is as long as he's living some kinda life. But make him do it. If not walk out (go Visit family or friends)and return. If he want to act like a child treat him like one. The point is to get him moving, and try not to follow what he does best which is "nothing". Set goals!! and stick them no matter what.

Answer 5

Well sweetie, If you asking this question they the love is gone. Have you tried marriage counseling? I would at least attempt it then at least you can say honestly that you did everything you can to make it work. I feel for you. It's not a good place to be in and it makes for a miserable life. If you feel the marriage cannot be saved, get out. Find someone who makes you happy and treats you the way you deserve to be treated. Life is too short to put up with all of his ****. I wish you the best and I hope you find happiness.

Answer 6

He drinks 24/7 but he's not a nasty drunk anymore? Sorry girl...he's a drunk! And nothing good will come out of it. Find a way to get out of this situation, even if he threatens suicide, get him help. But get out of there yourself!

Answer 7

you are confused lady i am also near your age group and reiki master and vastu consultant problems like you read in this coloumn come at my place so many times i only give you one tip think positively your in love with your husband but you need carefull feeling from your husband site which is not available now .simply think positive and go for light reiki treatment from your friend ashu which is am with distance healing without any charge simply send photo to me by mail or hard copy your. problem is just 1 month away from my thinking . i give you cell no but first send your photograph

Answer 8

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Answer 9

Dear Friends,,

I want to advise one of many ways to solve this problem



my marriedge also same age with you, how i can be smart toghether? I always used / apply consept GIVE AND TAKE and FIRE VS WATER

it means,, when my partner in hot temper, i make my self cold and my mouth shout up. when she cold down. i come to her from back and give romantic kissing. after that we discuss what happening and how our feeling.

one other ways,, we used a piece of paper and list up in column WHAT MAKE US BORE WITH PARTNER, WHAT WE HOPE MY PARTNER CAN GIVE TO ME, BETTER ITEM ABOUT OUR PARTNER, BAD THING ABOUT OUR PARTNER



in best advise you can email me, my english no quiet good,. i'm familiar used melay langguage. 60129573564 or [e-mail]