Question:
How would you react to your husband not coming home at night?
?
2011-02-26 00:00:45 UTC
Tonight was a close friend's birthday so I broke away from my husband of less than year and went out with the girls for the first time since my bachelorette "party" a year ago. My husband took this opportunity to go visit some guy friends who we see on a regular basis. Before he left I asked him, "Please, do not drive drunk--not even buzzed." He asked the same of me which was odd because I don't really drink. The girls and I had dinner, dessert, and enjoyed a game of Telestrations, which is hilarious and you ought to try it. Our game ended and I headed home around 2AM, giving him a call to apologize for being out so late. I asked if he was home or heading home, to which he replied, "I tried but everyone said I was too drunk to drive." He's going to be staying there overnight.

I'm really quite furious. I don't feel it is appropriate for him to be out partying like he doesn't have a wife waiting for him at home. Not to mention the horrifying fact that he would have driven home drunk had he not been stopped. I'm really upset with and when I spoke with him I told him he had better not come home unless he's in a taxi. How would you react if your husband went out partying and just.. didn't come home and didn't appear to have any intention of calling you to let you know? I am so angry I don't know what to think. I'm even considering moving into our guest bedroom. What would you do?
Ten answers:
2011-02-26 00:06:35 UTC
Drive over there and get him and put HIM in the guest bedroom.And if he's hung over tomorrow, make him a VERY noisy breakfast.
2011-02-26 07:27:03 UTC
How about you stop being so controlling? Who are you to say what is an appropriate ammount of time to be away? You do not own him. What if he told you you dont need to come home at all if you are not home by midnight and you come back at 3 instead?



Two can play that game he can make up situations that involve you and decide to have very little respect for them. He wants to be out more and party harder than you want. Only because you dont want it as much does not mean you should hold a grudge.
Angela C
2011-02-26 00:16:37 UTC
Why did he not take a taxi? Make it plain to him that that is what he should have done, and that this is the one and only time you will accept this sort of thing happening. Besides being completely selfish of him, it would have been extremely worrying for you had he not arrived home, and not let you know where he was.



Hopefully you won't have to go through it again. And, yes, the other contributor is right - make HIM sleep in the guest room.
?
2011-02-26 00:06:34 UTC
Freedom and love go hand and hand. Are you free from him? is he free from you? If not then it's not love simple. Love is not mere trade. Once you feel this total feel of freedom, then you love yourself which is life and death. Then you will see this question quiet differently. Thats one thing.



We are trying to understand the problem of marriage, in which is implied sexual relationship, love, companionship, communion. Obviously if there is no love, marriage becomes a disgrace, does it not? Then it becomes mere gratification. To love is one of the most difficult things, is it not? Love can come into being, can exist only when the self is absent. Without love, relationship is a pain; however gratifying, or however superficial, it leads to boredom, to routine, to habit with all its implications. Then, sexual problems become all important. In considering marriage, whether it is necessary or not, one must first comprehend love. Surely, love is chaste, without love you cannot be chaste; you may be a celibate, whether a man or a woman, but that is not being chaste, that is not being pure, if there is no love.



If you have an ideal of chastity, that is if you want to become chaste, there is no love in it either because it is merely the desire to become something which you think is noble, which you think will help you to find reality; there is no love there at all. Licentiousness is not chaste, it leads only to degradation, to misery. So does the pursuit of an ideal. Both exclude love, both imply becoming something, indulging in something; and therefore you become important, and where you are important, love is not.
2011-02-26 00:11:28 UTC
maybe they had too much to drink and spending the night there and not driving. where I live it is freaking cold and sometimes the guys will sleep there. I would rather that they stay there and not drive in dangerous conditions. Those guys play cards all night and camp out in couches and spare rooms. too dark to drive. i don't know the weather where you live, but is is dangerous to drive at night. Just enjoy a hot bath and a movie. Next time invite the girlfriends to watch chickflick movies. Don't worry I bet they are watching funny movies that guys like.
Tay Jensen
2011-02-26 00:08:54 UTC
Yeah I would be mad too, glad my husband doesn't drink.

If this is the first time this has ever happened, I would forgive and forget... he is human after all.



If this is, or becomes a habitual thing then confront him and give him an ultimatum. If he doesn't buck up by the deadline then say it's over. The last thing you want is an alcoholic husband. Not health.



But like I said, if this has only happened once, give him the benefit of the doubt and let it go.
Yesi
2011-02-26 00:14:00 UTC
Go get him. Take him to bed at home. When you wake up the next morning just talk to him about it. Don't fight tonight just sleep peacefully.
BRAE
2011-02-26 00:10:52 UTC
gawd....your a real nag aren't you !? you told him not to drive drunk and his friends had him stay there to keep him safe.....good thing.

you weren't home waiting for him, you were out with your girls having fun as he was with his friends....HELLO !

maybe he was going to call but you called him first.....



pull your panties outa your a$$ and chill !
2011-02-26 00:06:39 UTC
serve him fried testicles for lunch, if he makes it home by noon, that is.

really, what an ***!

move to the guest room.
Zonneveld
2011-02-26 00:14:50 UTC
I would divorce him.


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