I Can't trust my husband?

Question

I saw some flirty messages my husband sent from myspace to random girls 3 years ago. I found out by using a keylogger which i still havent told him about. I also saw that he has another account that he wasn't using at all so I created a fake account and flirted with him and he flirted back. I confronted him about the account with his real name on it and he said it was nothing just messing around with mates who were doing the same thing, he deleted his account the same night.
The next day I sent him another flirty message (to his other account) from my fake account and he replied and asked for sexy pictures. I then asked to meet up instead and he refused and said he was in relationship.
I was devastated that he could carry on flirting after I had poured my heart out, but was relieved he did not meet up with me.
3 Years on and I still could not trust him and asked him to take a polygraph test which came back that he had never cheated for the 8 years we've been together.
The thing is, I still cant trust him because he asked for those sexy pics after he had seen how upset and heartbroken I was about the flirting.
How can I move on from this?

Answer 1

Well to tell you the truth I couldn't that's what you call a per and how do you know he doesn't have Any other accounts are he might just have a sex problem and like getting turned on by random women! If I was you I would find out more then dumb his butt sorry but it's the truth and he only probly deleted that site bc he knew you found out he lied to you befor and how do you he still ain't lying I hope that test person asked if he was still doin that bc if he didn't And asked if he was cheating or messing around is a complete differnt thing girl and so is being a per asking girls for sexy pics lf I were you I would find out more and if you find somthing you need to move on with out him!

Hope this helps!

Answer 2

Relax a little, he's faithful and always has been!



Trust is the assumption/belief that someone will act in a particular way. It is mainly a female thing.



I was told a story by a counsellor I saw:



He was talking about another (female) client of his who had come into her session ranting about how her bf had not done this and that and the other, and he obviously wasn't any good as a bf because of it, and she was thinking of ending it with him.



The counsellor said, "oh dear, I'm sorry, that's sounds so bad, when did you tell him he had to do all of that stuff?" She apparently was speechless, "well...I mean....I didn't....he's just supposed to know!!"





If we don't tell someone something, how are they supposed to know? If they don't agree to it, why should we hold them to it?



The issue with Trust is yours only, not your husband's. Don't throw away the relationship based on the idea that if someone breaks your trust they are not worth it, that idea is flawed. You need counselling for the issue of trust.



But you also need to talk openly with your husband about both of your actions and assumptions about each other's behaviour. You need to come clean with him, and you both need to assess whether you are assuming each other will behave in a certain way, where actually that's not realistic or healthy.



Good luck!

Answer 3

Trust?

You did the same thing by using keylogger and making a fake account. You should be relieved he said he was in a relationship and only wanted to see some nude pictures.



Flirting online is entertainment and fun when you are bored. I do it all the time with many women or men acting like women.



You should send him some nude bodyshots of yourself so he can masturbate to your image. That's really pretty funny!

Answer 4

He is looking at hot chicks everyday. You have to get over it. When he sees the top of a thong above the jean line of a girl his mouth waters. When a gal bends over and he sees down her shirt his heart quickens and he gets lead in his pants. These are facts and nothing you or he can do. He is a man by nature and a faithful one so you should cherish him. Looking is not a crime so don't put him in the dog house. I can see your point about the facebook thing but again he is not a cheater he is a flirter. You are making a big mistake if you let your jealousy and low self esteem sabotage your relationship. The last thing you want to do is push him away.

Answer 5

it quite is not any longer uncomplicated... i will inform you that, somewhat in case you have been cheated on interior the previous! i'm assuming at this element that the only reason you're having worry trusting him is "on your head" -- there is not any circumstantial or actual evidence to "convict" him. If he's telling you that he's not noticing different women, he's mendacity. end of tale. adult men only can no longer administration the way their eyes roam. My suggestion is to earnings to settle for this and understand that your husband could in no way quite ACT on those instincts. Being open with one yet another approximately different persons which you discover eye-catching could help strengthen your bond. working example, in case you spot a warm guy it quite is critical look at, element it out, after which tell your husband how and why he's sooooo plenty greater effective. If he's something like my husband, or maximum adult men for that count, they are going to be definitely floored which you have motives that they are greater effective than the common "attractive guy" As for him being warm and hectic approximately having a set of attractive women chasing him, that throughout all hazard could basically ensue in his wildest fantasies! women may be predators, yet frequently they choose something different than intercourse, and a guy will see this in the present day and only no longer have an interest. And, maximum adult men will think of a girl that's only too uncomplicated is, nicely, too uncomplicated and not prefer to the touch that. In end, till he's cheated on you interior the previous, or there is genuine evidence that he has been cheating, provide him the convenience of the doubt. He would not have married you if he thought he would desire to locate himself absolutely everyone greater effective than you. i'm particular in his eyes, you somewhat are the main alluring lady interior the international! only enable him the occasional sidelong look or pornographic magazine... understanding which you will no longer freak out over something like which will make him much greater look after with you and make you look much greater eye-catching to him than you already are.

Answer 6

If you can't trust your husband and have to go to those extremes than maybe you ought to re think your position in this marriage.. Your insecurities seem validated but do you really want to live the rest of your life like this?

Answer 7

key logger or fake account, that is not the point. your husband asked for nude pictures from another woman, that would do it for me and i would have left so he can continue to collect pictures like a sorry loser and i would be able to find a real man!

Answer 8

you have nothing to worry about--asking for sexy pics is nothing much but you could ask him why he finds the need rather than jsut not trusting him-sit him down and ask what's missing in your relationship that makes him want to do that

Answer 9

Without trust you have NOTHING.



You move on by breaking contact with him. taking one day at a time and surround yourself with positive friends and family.

Get into counseling and get mentally healthy before getting into the next relationship.



Good Luck

Answer 10

trust is the most important thing in a relationship. if you can't trust your husband, then there's no point in continuing the relationship.

Answer 11

I hate to say this but if you dont have TRUST YOU HAVE NOTHING!!!



You need to either get over it or move on. Your going to make yourself sick over this!

Answer 12

This guy would be better off without you, do him a favor

Answer 13

he could be just a b.s'r.. and messing with folks whom he never has to deal with.



many folks do that.. i was one.. but my ol' lady helped out finally when she was ok with it... we're evil, yes, i know.



well... have you talked it out with him about this?

only one way to know. it's your marriage... might as well get it out now!

Answer 14

All men flirt.

Answer 15

No trust u have nada

Answer 16

if you don't trust him leave him. end of story.